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Need help with suspected AS dilemma

wondering

Hi, I am new to this forum and would like some advice on what to do about my partners daughter who is 28 and for many years I have suspected that there is something wrong with her. After doing some research after reading an article that struck a chord I think I am led to believing she may be somewhere on the Autistic/Aspergers Spectrum. I have mentioned my concerns to my partner previously but he brushes it off thinking she is just very lazy and quirky.

My concerns are based on these facts, she is a loner, never had friends, never had a relationship, finds it hard to hold down a job, she runs back and forth in the house and stomps about, may break into a run when we are out and about, has a very odd bouncy walk, you may as well talk to a wall as askl her to do anything. She can never ever do any task big or small straight away (it will take weeks of nagging) and is always late for any departure time that is neccessary. She also talks in an odd fashion, not just normal flowing conversation. I also hear her having sort of arguements with herself in her room and she makes lists of everything.

I need to perhaps have some confirmation that this sounds like an AS problem and maybe my partner will listen so she could get some help. I have always been at loggerheads with her thinking she is abysmally lazy and dirty but obviously it is more than that.

Thank you for any imput anyone may have.

Parents

  • From what you write, it does sound as though you would not be amiss to suspect a difficulty like AS. But other conditions could also be responsible, like dyspraxia or ADHD, which only a qualified clinician could tell you for sure.

    Have you told your partner's daughter of your concerns? She might be aware already of being different.

    There is, however, the danger of labelling people with aspergers when the label does not always apply, and this is because autism is a spectrum. Many of the traits exist in the general population, but it would be erroneous to label all these people as having aspergers just because they have a few traits. So your partner may show traits in common with his daughter, but this does not mean he has any condition, just that there is a common genetic influence at play - aspergers is genetic, but is not always completely passed on. I almost certainly inherited some of it from my mum and dad (my dad in particular), but he does not have aspergers. True, he has always been a bit of a loner and quite self-absorbed, but he functions normally. I sometimes joke about him being a bit Asperger, but would never suggest he actually has the condition.

    Your daughter sounds as though she may have Aspergers, or at least something similar. A diagnosis would open doors for her to access support, but even if she does not have Aspergers, it sounds as though she needs help.

Reply

  • From what you write, it does sound as though you would not be amiss to suspect a difficulty like AS. But other conditions could also be responsible, like dyspraxia or ADHD, which only a qualified clinician could tell you for sure.

    Have you told your partner's daughter of your concerns? She might be aware already of being different.

    There is, however, the danger of labelling people with aspergers when the label does not always apply, and this is because autism is a spectrum. Many of the traits exist in the general population, but it would be erroneous to label all these people as having aspergers just because they have a few traits. So your partner may show traits in common with his daughter, but this does not mean he has any condition, just that there is a common genetic influence at play - aspergers is genetic, but is not always completely passed on. I almost certainly inherited some of it from my mum and dad (my dad in particular), but he does not have aspergers. True, he has always been a bit of a loner and quite self-absorbed, but he functions normally. I sometimes joke about him being a bit Asperger, but would never suggest he actually has the condition.

    Your daughter sounds as though she may have Aspergers, or at least something similar. A diagnosis would open doors for her to access support, but even if she does not have Aspergers, it sounds as though she needs help.

Children
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