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Weigh more but feel worse physically

Lilac

So I used to weigh less but I gained a stone though it took a long time to do. I got referred to an eating disorder team when I was worse when I was nearly 18 (I'm 24 now) they knew I had autism and how it effected things but still diagnosed me with ednos. I didn't really gain whilst I saw them for 6 months and then they had a review meeting and told me I didn't have an eating disorder and they got it wrong, it was just my autism cause I don't like changes. So then they got rid of me and the general mental health people wouldn't help cause they don't deal with eating problems, so I've been trying to deal with it on my own ever since. I've felt dizzy and tired for months and I'm getting a doctors appointment when they're is one available but it's frustrating when I gain weight get to nearly a normal weight and yet I feel worse physically. My sister said I'm a woman now not a child so that would make a difference. I don't want to gain more weight though.

Parents Reply
  • in reply to Chloe Mod

    I'm only going to the doctor about my dizziness and tiredness, I'm expecting to just have a blood test and my blood pressure checked. I don't have a diagnosis of an eating disorder since the person who diagnosed it, took it back and said they'd got it wrong, it's just my autism cause I don't like changes. 

Children
  • in reply to Lilac

    It's a good idea to get the tiredness and dizziness checked out. Those are quite unspecific symptoms so it could be related to so many things. In terms of the weight, I feel like sometimes too much emphasis is put on that. Yes, it's not good to be very underweight or overweight, but I feel like it is so much more productive to focus on eating well and having  a good relationship with food, good stress management etc- if those things are working well, then it is likely the weight will correct itself. You can gain weight without having good nutrition. It's very likely that the reason that you are not feeling well, doesn't have anything to do with the weight gain! There are many reasons for tiredness and dizziness. 

    I have been severely underweight a few times and was desperate to gain weight. Initially, I thought I just had to gain weight at all cost and that would fix everything- but it didn't work. Gaining weight alone is not enough to fix everything. Yes it was good I was no longer dangerously underweight. I didn't go about the weight gain in a good way and it really upset my IBS and digestion and in a way I also felt more ill/ nauseous etc than before. Maybe a bit more energy but not even that sometimes... That made me frustrated. And without meaning too I would just end up slowly slowly unintentionally loosing the weight- this cycled happened several times with me getting more and more fed up and desperate. It's really not very helpful to focus on weight. Now I am going about it very differently. I understand myself better, I now know I am autistic. I am finally realising stress/anxiety are a huge factor when it comes to my digestive issues. I understand that I probably have ARFID and can better see what is happening. Yes I want to gain weight, but I am mainly just working on my stress management and eating more variety, more regularly and in a more balanced way and I can tell the weight is starting to come on too. It is so tempting to just blame the food or eating for everything - wouldn't it be easy if all we had to do was fix our eating eg. eat more/ gain weight and that would fix everything. Or if we could simply blame certain foods for digestive issues and cut those out... but sadly it is usually much more complicated than that. Which is overwhelming but in a way it is also freeing. 

  • in reply to Lilac

    Hello Lilac, I'm Number.

    We autists do struggle with all manner of weird and wonderful thoughts and behaviours that normies simply can't (or won't) understand.  It is lonely.

    The good news (from my experience) is that although we can struggle for ages and it can seem endless and hopeless (because one is effectively fighting with oneself) breakthroughs can happen very dramatically and positively from out of nowhere.

    I suffered from regulation control in respect to my drinking of booze.  I wasn't a raging drunk by any means, but my relationship with alcohol was not appropriate.  I spent ages focused on that as "the problem" which is a perfectly sensible approach, but it got me nowhere.  However, when I realised that it wasn't the problem, but merely a symptom......then I made dramatic progress and resolved the alcohol issue without even needing to think about it.

    I tell you these things for three reasons;

    1.  Rest assured, you are not alone in your struggles.

    2.  The thing that you feel is the issue (in your case eating) may not be what actually needs tackling.

    3.  Never despair, there is always hope.

    I hope to run into you again on the pages.

    Best wishes

    Number.