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Stealing food

Jenny

Hi. My son is 12 and was diagnosed with asperges 2 years ago. I find that he is increasing stealing food from the cupboards and then I find wrappers in his room. This is all sugar heavy stuff so crisps. Chocolates etc. he is putting on weight fast and despite putting a lock on the cupboard it’s carrying on 

I guess my question is, does anyone else have this challenge? And what do I do about it? A dietician? A therapist? 

im at my wits end.

thanks in advance. 

Parents

  • I used to do this as a child and I was punished for it. Fine there were reasons that probably don't apply to your situation but I still remember the punishments and being told I was greedy and selfish and it has impacted me throughout my life. 

    My thoughts (how I would have liked it to be handled) are that you sit down and ask your son why he does it. This will probably lead to you both being able to come to an agreement on a way forward. Ask him how you can help him in this area of life and explain how he can help you. It is important that it doesn't become a contentious issue as it will stay with him. 

    It's a behaviour that he does for a reason, it could be that he's hungry or it could be that he's stressed and needs the feeling of the food he is using to cope. Talking to him is really the only way this can be solved. I would also recommend that the word 'stealing' isn't used because of the negative connotations associated with it. He is likely to take it to heart and this could have the effect of creating more stress and exacerbating the situation. 

    I hope this helps you both.

Reply

  • I used to do this as a child and I was punished for it. Fine there were reasons that probably don't apply to your situation but I still remember the punishments and being told I was greedy and selfish and it has impacted me throughout my life. 

    My thoughts (how I would have liked it to be handled) are that you sit down and ask your son why he does it. This will probably lead to you both being able to come to an agreement on a way forward. Ask him how you can help him in this area of life and explain how he can help you. It is important that it doesn't become a contentious issue as it will stay with him. 

    It's a behaviour that he does for a reason, it could be that he's hungry or it could be that he's stressed and needs the feeling of the food he is using to cope. Talking to him is really the only way this can be solved. I would also recommend that the word 'stealing' isn't used because of the negative connotations associated with it. He is likely to take it to heart and this could have the effect of creating more stress and exacerbating the situation. 

    I hope this helps you both.

Children
  • in reply to Rai

    Yes Rai - I agree. No shaming, no accusations, just working together to work out a positive way forward for all. Lots of communication, lots of unconditional love, lots of empathy and understanding is required. You love your son - a vital part of all relationships is to treat each other with respect. It goes both ways.