Published on 12, July, 2020
Hello, I've posted previously regarding my Son who is autistic, recently diagnosed as a young adult. I am wondering if my daughter who is 10 is struggling and has been off school. Can you take a look at what I'm describing and give your thoughts please?
She has had poor school attendance since Christmas due to what seems to be severe school anxiety and our GP told us to keep her off and referred her to CAMHS. She's was in such a state she would curl up into the fetal position before school and couldn't talk. She has also pretended to be a cat, crawling around, meowing, she wouldn't speak, but wrote a note saying cats don't go to school and told me she wishes she was a cat or dog because they are free. I do not know whether her pretending to be cat is showing us just how anxious she is about school. Has anyone came across this?
Looking back, she has always had some school anxiety mainly around talking to adults, taking part in activities where she has to do anything in front of others. She is also overwhelmed by loud teachers, is very sensitive, doesn't like watching people eat and certain clothing - if clothing doesn't feel right she will get very annoyed (we had this with her brother but his was more obvious with him as a toddler). We also used to enourage her to join activities but she wouldn't want to, arranging all for her only to not be able to go in the building.
I'm also wondering whether she masks, I can only describe it as if a switch is flicked. She is completely different at school and in social situations. She struggles to talk to teachers and when I have seen her talking to them, it's as if she is acting in another voice and as as soon as she is with her immediate and family she is happy and able to speak freely. When with her friends (she has a few) she is very loud but very sensitive and gets upset easily. She recently called a girl out for being mean, no one else picked this up and she ran with it but it got turned onto her and she got very upset as she was only trying to help. She is also very willful and has her own sense of style with clothing and grown up views about things. She's gone through phases and obsessions to do with the Titanic, Anime and space, collecting precious stones. She will also go through food fads, wanting certain foods everyday. I have also noticed she will jump up and flap her hands when happy about something.
She semed very quick to learn when younger, could write her name at the age of 2.5 and her vocabulary was very good. She learnt to read with virtually no help. When she was little, she couldn't go to sleep on her own, had to have the same song sang to her and preferred me reading a children's dictionary to her rather than story books.
Things seem to be falling apart for her and she is struggling. Can anyone offer any insight please? Thank you.
One thing to bear in mind is autism often manifests at points of transition like starting a new school. When old coping strategies end up breaking down. An autistic person of average or better intelligence in a forgiving environment with good coping strategies in place may not seem to be autistic. Move them to a less forgiving environment where their coping strategies don't work and it all falls apart.
We get lots of people on here asking 'should I get my child assessed.' The answer is almost always yes. Because there is very little to loose and a great deal to gain, in terms of needed help, if indeed they are autistic.
Thank you for your helpful reply Peter.
We have been to CAMHS and my daughter only managed to nodd when asked if crowds bothered her. They mentioned sensory issues maybe indicating ASD and we are waiting to hear if they can offer help.
sounds like that was a generic interview not a pre autism assessment assessment. I'd suggest specifically raising autism with CAMHS and asking them to consider assessment.