Supporting my very sensory son through early experiences of wet dreams

My son is 12 and has no concept of sex or masturbation and is completely unaware of himself and can’t ‘feel’ when he has an erection…. But the last month he has started to experience wet dreams and it is so frequent- 3 times a week. He’s not touching himself but does stim an awful lot- and is hugely sensory. He understands the basics of what’s happening and if he wakes up ‘soggy’ as he calls it he quietly takes himself for a shower, but it’s triggering quite a strong OCD reaction( not uncommon for him- lockdown anxiety instigated toothbrushing for 45mins). So the shower lasts over 30mins and he is very down for hours after….  Any help or advice.

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  • If a teenager's emissions will occur during the day, at the wrong time, you will have to tell him about the benefits of masturbation. Explain that this can only be done with clean hands. Agree that the teenager will be able to stay alone and be sure that no one will break into the room at the most inopportune moment. Choose what is convenient for you: from the obligatory knock on the door to the sign on it.  You also need to understand that prolonged abstinence can affect potency. The main thing is that things don't get to the point where he then looks for Alternative treatments for erection problems. Good luck to you!

  • Hi Mammajamma,

    Sorry to hear you are having some stuggles at the moment with this, may I suggest contact our Parent to Parent service? They offer emotional support to parents and carers of children or adults with autism.

    Their contact number is 0808 800 4106. Leave them a message and they should call you back as soon as possible at a time that suits you. You can also contact them vis this web form: https://www.autism.org.uk/what-we-do/help-and-support/parent-to-parent 

    Hope that helps!

    Best,

    SarahMod