Stressed Out.

I'm half way through my chemo.   I have a CT scan tomorrow which may deliver good, bad or very bad news.   

I'm sooooo stressed I can't keep it together..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pXRviuL6vMY

Parents
  • Hi Plastic, wishing you the very best for tomorrow! Classical music could be relaxing (or maybe some of the film scores like Lord of the Rings or Star Wars!)

  • Thanks - the scan is not the issue - it's just a quick ride through the washing machine.  Smiley    It's the potential results that's scaring the crap out of me.   They gave me 3-6 months in October and the chemo is just palliative. Disappointed 

    Classical music could be relaxing (or maybe some of the film scores like Lord of the Rings or Star Wars!)

    I'm getting triggered at any emotional music - Siegfried's Funeral, Sprach Zarathustra, Fingal's Cave, Aquarium -  practically anything with strong flash-back memories.

    My life is laid out in full technicolour in front of me - all 20,000 days of it - and I get the scan results on my birthday next week..

  • I'm so sorry to hear that..... Apologies, the music is very emotional, you must be feeling a lot of things at the moment. I'll be thinking of you tomorrow and hoping for the very best result, and hopefully you'll be able to get a very relaxed night's sleep before.

Reply Children
  • hopefully you'll be able to get a very relaxed night's sleep before.

    Insomnia

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P8JEm4d6Wu4

    But there's no release, no peace
    I toss and turn without cease
    Like a curse, open my eyes, rise like yeast.
    At least a couple of weeks
    Since I last slept, kept takin' sleepers
    But now I keep myself pep
    Deeper still, the night
    I write by candlelight, I find insight
    Fundamental movement
    So when it's black
    This insomnia takin'-original-tack(?)
    Keep the beast in my nature
    Under ceaseless attack... I gets no sleep
    I can't get no sleep.