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Finding it hard to find something the same.

Cozy Wozy

Hi everyone, really struggling at the moment with motivation. I was thinking about why earlier and it’s because I can’t find something familiar and the same as what I always do because of this lockdown. It’s not really about going out as I don’t do much of that anyway so it appears that not much as changed. What has changed is the familiar. I am very much a routine person who likes to eat the same food at the same time for example. This has changed as I can’t always get what I normally order so I spend time worrying about shopping. Another routine familiar is that I usually take my dog out in the morning and afternoon and It’s usually quiet as I live in a village. Now it’s full of cyclists, runners, children on bikes and people I have never seen in the village and is a sensory nightmare.

I usually watch one lot of news a day to see what’s happening in the world. Now every news, advert and programme is consumed by “the virus”.

I am normally like this if something is going to be different in my day such as a parcel that’s going to be delivered or someone is calling me or I have to go somewhere at a certain time. I become almost paralysed and can’t focus on anything until it’s happened regardless of if there are other things to do in the house.

So right now I feel in that unmotivated state as if waiting for it to finish so I can get on, but because everything is different now everyday I can’t seem to function. I have loads of interests and hobbies that I do at home usually. I just think it must be because I can’t seem to find something familiar that isn’t being effected by what’s going on in the world at the moment.

Sorry about the long post. I’m not good at keeping things short either :-)

Parents

  • Hi.      Sorry it's all getting a bit much for you.       Can I suggest that because of our automatic pattern-creation programming, watching the news will stress you out - it's only bad news so you will feel it all closing in on you because there's no 'nice' destination so it's too depressing.   

    I've avoided UK news for over a year now - it's all fake news anyway so not hearing it is so much nicer.     I get the gist of it from other sources but I really don't want to hear the details.        I watch US news because I visit there regularly so it's nice to keep up with events there - but it doesn't actually affect me because it's 3000 miles away.

    Another strategy for the differences in your village is just to spend the time to watch.     Spot the patterns and work out when the best time for you occurs.      Think of it as a science experiment.      I quite like people-watching just for that reason.

    I'm watching a lot of youtube right now - cats & puppies and fail army.      Letting it just wash over me.    I'm also catching up on-line with TV that I've missed - the latest series of Car SOS etc.

    What hobbies are you avoiding?     

  • in reply to Plastic

    Hi Plastic

    thankyou for your reply and suggestions. I did start watching the news a lot when this started and it really did start to depress me so maybe it would be a good idea to not watch any and just watch catchup tv instead. I am glad you mentioned the automatic pattern creation programming. I think I have just got overwhelmed with all the virus stuff. I too like people watching so I will start an experiment so I can find a new time to go out. 

    I like crochet and enjoy creating my own patterns, but it’s been hard to focus on with what I mentioned in my post. I also like painting, reading and writing. 

Reply
  • in reply to Plastic

    Hi Plastic

    thankyou for your reply and suggestions. I did start watching the news a lot when this started and it really did start to depress me so maybe it would be a good idea to not watch any and just watch catchup tv instead. I am glad you mentioned the automatic pattern creation programming. I think I have just got overwhelmed with all the virus stuff. I too like people watching so I will start an experiment so I can find a new time to go out. 

    I like crochet and enjoy creating my own patterns, but it’s been hard to focus on with what I mentioned in my post. I also like painting, reading and writing. 

Children
  • in reply to Cozy Wozy

    Hi - The ebay fees are around 10% of the selling price and paypal charge about 4% for a payment transaction.    not sure about etsy but they will probably be similar.      Don't be afraid of shipping small things worldwide - it's no more difficult than sending to the UK.

    The whole CFS/ME payback is a pain - I can overdo things and rob my body but it costs.      For example, my brother lives 150 miles away and the journey is very start/stop so just sitting as a passenger resisting the motions of the car is exhausting.      After a weekend there, we get home around 5pm on the Sunday and I immediately fall asleep - until Tuesday.     My wife says I come around like a sleepy baby - lights are on but no-one's home - and then I fade out again.

    I find socialising with NTs hard - I can manage about an hour before I'm done.

    I'm a super-qualified engineer - I can *do* anything - but everything takes forever to get done and I sleep a lot because of it.

    How do you manage your day to day?   

    I've got a huge list of things I want to achieve but it's an energy/health prioritisation thing - and of course, a money thing.   Smiley

  • in reply to Plastic

    Thanks Plastic. I think I did look at Etsy a long time ago but got a bit confused with fees and PayPal fees etc. Mind you that was when my M.E wasn’t stable and just reading for a few moments was exhausting. 
    I’m sorry to hear you have it too. I understand the planing energy usage thing. I have always had social and sensory exhaustion which I now know is because of ASD but having M.E as well adds to the challenge. I was house bound at one point but now through better energy management I can walk my dog. 

    By the way I walked a bit later yesterday and it was definitely quieter. 

    I get the holiday thing too and needing to sleep for a week to recover. It’s so important to have enjoyment though, which unfortunately with M.E has payback.

    i hope you get to the restaurant mountain cafe one day to have your coffee whilst taking in the spectacular view.

  • in reply to Cozy Wozy

    Cool - ebay and etsy are good places to sell things - I deal in vintage synthesizers and large model boats.

    I have CFS too - mine was caused by a brain injury in 2013.       I lost my job in mid 2015 because I just couldn't manage it.    

    Not working means I can plan my energy exertions without someone stealing 40 hours without my consent.       I have a bunch of other serious health problems so my functional time is incredibly valuable to me.      

    We do Disney regularly but it's getting much harder for me to cope with it - but the holiday is not just for me so I plan my energy carefully so I am totally destroyed by the time I get home - it's takes a week of sleeping to get over it - but we all get to wring the most out of Disney.

    I'm at the point now where I need one of those electric chair things for Epcot.  Disappointed     I can still manage the other parks - just.

    I want to do Mt Pilatus - there's rack-railways and cable cars - I understand there's a restaurant on the top - I want to feel that ice-cold air with the spectacular views and have a coffee there.  Smiley

  • in reply to Plastic

    Thanks Plastic, your suggestions have definitely shifted the way I was thinking earlier which was pretty negative. 
    sorry to hear you are missing your Chester visit but glad you are rescheduling.

    i used to travel and have been to the US many times, but haven’t been anyway for a long while since I became unwell with M.E and had to stop work. 

    i have been thinking for a while about setting up an online business  selling my crafts.  So maybe I could start writing up what that may look like. 

  • in reply to Cozy Wozy

    The news pattern-creation thing is a gift and a curse.      Unfortunately, in these depressing times, we only see the bad stuff so there's an overload of negativity.       

    Are you able to build plans for nice things?      Like a bucket list of things to achieve when this all sorts itself out.       I'm actually supposed to be in Chester this week - seeing the Roman stuff and visiting the zoo (the one on the telly).        We'll reschedule for later in the year.

    We're were planning on doing the whole Disney Florida thing next March - doesn't look like that will happen but we can do 2022 instead.     I look at it that we have more time to save up.

    What would you like to do?