Do I have autism ?

Easy said:

I understand autistics may not be very interested in other peoples emotions, and therefore dont practise it much, but surely everyone knows that if someone is putting their coat on they are about to leave or if they are shouting they are angry ?

..... It stands to reason that through experience it is possible to learn and adapt. It may come less natural for someone with Aspergers however. Misunderstandings on a more subtle level may still occur. It is a spectrum and everyone is different.

I believe that traits may become less identifiable or more pronounced depending on a persons circumstance and age. Some AS people may have become so good at 'acting' and 'camouflage' that it becomes very difficult for a Doctor to diagnose....

The Imp of the Perverse said:

As for getting one's coat or shouting, someone with a ToM difficulty can understand the meaning of the action but not its significance at the time it is taking place. That's why the behaviour of Aspies themselves can seem to follow a predictable pattern to an NT but the significance to the Aspie can be the complete opposite to how the NT views it. If anyone wants to correc this feel free but this has been my experience and much more so the Aspies I know.

Is it really an aspie thing that people read behaviour differently ?

you could say the same for cultures, ages, depression etc.

I consider myself less volatile in my emotions and find NT's difficult to read but I think very often they dont know what they are going to do next themselves because their emotions are all over the place.

Funnily enough, Easy, having read your first post, your experience and wishes seem much closer to mine than many people I've read about...well apart from the anxiety but my lack of fear is not a healthy thing. Strange how anxiety and a lack of fear go together...I suppose the anxiety is a day-to-day thing but the lack of fear seems much more part of me. I don't really care what happens to me but other people make me anxious. My lack of fear makes others anxious and so it goes round and round!

I suppose I do feel anxious and uncomfortable around people, at the moment I live a fairly isolated life so I am comfortable most of the time but when I used to work I had to get away on my own or my mind would just start to zizz out, my memory would get bad , I couldnt concentrate and if I didnt stop I would get bad migraines.

I have never really called it anxiety, I just feel I have to get away and be on my own but I suppose anxiety is as good a word as any.

Interesting, personally I think people claim to understand other peoples emotions much more than they actually do.

It reminds me of experiments into suggestion and decision making, very often when people are asked why they made a decision the explaination they give is wrong, It seems our mechanism for explaining our behaviour is seperate from the actual decision making process.

This probably applies even more to our perception of other peoples motives, we may think we understand them but it really is very easy to fool most people, as magicians can easily demonstrate. 

Are NT's really better at understanding people or do they just think at a more superficial level and change their minds easily when they get it wrong ?

Easy said:

This was posted by hope in another thread :

Theory of Mind difficulties are unique to autism: problems understanding what someone is thinking and feeling and responding appropriately. Uta Frith (psychologist) has identified this as being the key differentiator between ASC and other conditions.

I dont get this, for example there are Autistic chessplayers in the world top 10

(Ivanchuck and Navarra) obviously they are very good at understanding what their opponent is thinking and predicting his moves.

Chess is primarily a game of logic, not psychology, and can be played purely on that level.

That being said, some top players try to introduce psychology into the game, but then throw a mardy when they get beaten by a computer and claim the competition unfair because they're unable to utilise psychology!

I understand autistics may not be very interested in other peoples emotions, and therefore dont practise it much, but surely everyone knows that if someone is putting their coat on they are about to leave or if they are shouting they are angry ?

The meaning of the action may be understood, but is the motive?

T.O.M. deals with the motive aspect of behaviour, rather than the meaning aspect.

This is one aspect of Autism Spectrum Conditions that I struggle with but it would seem not enough for my psychiatrist to say yay or nay one way or another. I think choosing chess as an example won't work because the game itself is so structured and a beginning chess players learns the basic strategies quite quickly to avoid being beaten easily. I would imagine, because I was way too impatient to learn to play chess deeply, that the board is the focus and not the player...all sorts of scenarios come up as the board changes...it's not like trying to tell if your opponent is bluffing in a card game.

As for getting one's coat or shouting, someone with a ToM difficulty can understand the meaning of the action but not its significance at the time it is taking place. That's why the behaviour of Aspies themselves can seem to follow a predictable pattern to an NT but the significance to the Aspie can be the complete opposite to how the NT views it. If anyone wants to correc this feel free but this has been my experience and much more so the Aspies I know.

Funnily enough, Easy, having read your first post, your experience and wishes seem much closer to mine than many people I've read about...well apart from the anxiety but my lack of fear is not a healthy thing. Strange how anxiety and a lack of fear go together...I suppose the anxiety is a day-to-day thing but the lack of fear seems much more part of me. I don't really care what happens to me but other people make me anxious. My lack of fear makes others anxious and so it goes round and round!

Even when I was at school my Parents told me off for constantly discussing the other children in my class.  My Mother even told me that I am sure that child is not discussing me.  I asked the other children whether they discuss me with their parents.

They said yes but not constantly.

What I am trying to say is that one should not sterotype Autsitic people.

I am sometimes accused of not caring about other people or sometimes caring too much about other people.

David

This was posted by hope in another thread :

Theory of Mind difficulties are unique to autism: problems understanding what someone is thinking and feeling and responding appropriately. Uta Frith (psychologist) has identified this as being the key differentiator between ASC and other conditions.

I dont get this, for example there are Autistic chessplayers in the world top 10

(Ivanchuck and Navarra) obviously they are very good at understanding what their opponent is thinking and predicting his moves.

I understand autistics may not be very interested in other peoples emotions, and therefore dont practise it much, but surely everyone knows that if someone is putting their coat on they are about to leave or if they are shouting they are angry ?

I cant see any contradictions, happy people want to understand themselves too.

Being miserable is not the only cause of self awareness.

A diagnosis is someone else's opinion, I dont always agree with what other people say. And people often misread me.

And I probably wouldnt trust what someone who only met me for a couple of hours said about me. 

I dont just want a aspy yes /no, I want to understand what it is and how thats relevant to me.

What you've posted is full of contradictions, Easy.

You say you're happy being you, but you want to understand yourself, and similar people.

You say you don't want a diagnosis, but you ask questions that appear to be you trying to ascertain whether you have an ASD or not.

I find that puzzling.

Scorpion0x17 said:

The odd thing is, Easy, you say you don't want a diagnosis, or to put a label on yourself, but yet you clearly took the time to find out about Aspergers and other ASDs, to find the NAS website, the fact it has community forums, and to post this thread.

Maybe, deep down, you do want that diagnosis, and that label?

dont think so, 

I want to understand myself, and similar people, 

as I see it a label is for other people, it might help them.

Also very skeptical about diagnosis, I think I know enough about it to get whatever diagnosis I want, it probably depends a lot on what I say.

I know you will be the same person what ever label you have.

They say that Autistic people cannot read emotions.

Well I can tell when people reject me.

In France in 1984 when I asked questions about getting back home near the end of the holiday. The Hotel Kepper said in a very happy voice is it the end of your Vacanse maning holiday.

In other words hoping I was leaving a little earlier than the end of the booking by the tone of his happy voice. I did not leave before the agreed date.

David

David [post edited to remove personal information by philippab - mod]

The odd thing is, Easy, you say you don't want a diagnosis, or to put a label on yourself, but yet you clearly took the time to find out about Aspergers and other ASDs, to find the NAS website, the fact it has community forums, and to post this thread.

Maybe, deep down, you do want that diagnosis, and that label?

Thanks for all the replies, I dont think a diagnosis would help as I am old enough to understand myself fairly well, and I dont seem to be a typical anything.

I dont want to pretend to be normal, but putting a label on myself just gives other people a chance to put their prejudices on me.

I dont think a diagnosis would be a revelation, and I cant think of any way it would help, apart from maybe a small chance of getting my sisters ex husband arrested for disability hate crime.

There is another thread where its said Aspie's have difficulty reading body language, 

I have never thought that about myself, I think I can do it if i want to but its not something I have ever concentrated on. I am good at reading body language of animals, for example dogs and cats.

I just think other peoples emotions are none of my business and shouldnt be my problem.

Easy said:

I find emotions annoying and pointless etc

I thought Aspie's were unemotional ?

'Annoyance' is an emotion too!

But, to answer your question, I've read and heard it stated that we on the spectrum tend to experience everything in extremes - or, as it's often put "in black and white terms" - this is something I sort of both agree with and don't agree with - I think it's more subtle and nuanced than that - but, anyway, what is also important is that we don't all experience one extreme or the other, just an extreme - so, for example, you may not experience strong emotions, but I experience extremely strong emotions - and yet we may well both be on the autistic spectrum (well, I know I am, having had a diagnosis).

I wouldn't say there was no point or benefit, it has certainly made my life easier but I guess it depends on the individual. I always lived my life pre-diagnosis living on the edges and not really understanding alot of things or people. Finding out was a revelation. The thing is, it's always been there, it just wasn't picked up on. So far I haven't met many people who look down on me because of it. If anyone does, it's their problem, not mine. It hasn't held me back, got a nice flat with my boyfriend, hold down a steady job and I have two degrees and am working on a third. But I am proud to call myself an Aspie. My sister also has it and she's quite a fantastic actress and judo player. We've been able to enhance our lives, rather than worry about how we are interacting with the normal world.

You do not want to have a label.?

It is up to you.

I pointed out in other discussions that the medical profession love giving people labels.

You have to decide if you want a label which might explain some of your problems.

David

Not looking to be tested at all,

from what I can see there is no point,

no benefits and some people might get the wrong idea,

thinking I was disabled or incompetent.

I really dont like the word Aspergers, It implies a disorder,

I think I am hyper evolved, emotions are what we used to make decisions when we were rats in holes, now we have bigger brains we should use them.

Do you live on your own?

If you have a computer you can join in discussions on the World Autism Network.

You can talk to people in Australia and the USA.

I know some people communicate more with people across the world than with their nearest and dearest close by.

David

Hi, not necessarily unemotional; it's more like emotions aren't the determining factor. It's a different way of thinking that can inhibit social understanding and interaction in mainstream society. That can cause anxiety and depression for a lot of people. As my father puts it, "it's a different way of thinking and communicating" but it's not one that is shared generally. Also as a spectrum disorder, it affects everyone differently. You can have some people who are withdrawn and unable to communicate and others who will completely bounce off the walls without restraint when put into a group.

Perhaps Aspergers? Best place to start is with your gp if you are looking to be tested.