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He can't fall asleep but is soooo tired!

SarahR

Hi,

just wondering if anyone has any suggestions about how i can help my 11 year old son to fall asleep??

he goes up to bed at 7:30pm, and is still awake a couple of hours later - it can get to midnight sometimes! as you can guess he's tired the next day, irritable and can never explain what's keeping him awake. he looks pale all the time, and sometimes we have a lot of bad nights in a row and he starts to look ill.

i have told him that we are trying switching all the lights off upstairs now, as he's old enough, and that upset him and he said it made him uncomfortable. i've tried baths, warm drinks, letting him read for half an hour.....short of using a rubber mallet, i don't know what else to try!! don't want to go down the drug route really....

thanks

 

Parents

  • It strikes me that 7.30 is incredibly early for an autistic child of 11 to go to bed.

    I suggest later would be better, as your current strategy means he doesnt fall asleep for hours anyway.

    exercise in the evening might be good.

    I used to findschool so stressful, and recently university too that i would be 'wired'.

    a pleasurable activity  which also uses energy can act as a detox.so maybe a walk or a bike ride , martial arts . .swimming is especially good if he can cope with the sensory issues of a swimming pool .

    dancing to music . . something he could do with you too.

    try to use your imagination and explore his pleasures.

    as for turning lights off . . .in my opinion a potentially disastrous move.

    try not to impose things on him. he is 11 and just because he is younger than you doesn't mean that he doesnt deserve respect and tolerance as a unique human being in the same way your husband or mother does.

    He likely sees and feels the world and its challenges differently than you , and the majority , do. I never understood why people do things at certain times . . living by the clock rather than listening to the messages our bodies give us.

    perhaps reconsider his room environment. what colours are there?

    is it 'noisy'?

    perhaps you could ask him if he would like to change it . . and follow his suggestions.

    Is he eating gluten in his diet?

    playing games in the evening rather than or as well as TV. and xBox

    chess, tiddley winks whatever.

    I would suggest the looking tired etc is as likely to be a result of stress as it is lack of sleep.

    sometimes i sleep with the radio on quietly . . classical music only.

    does he sleep alone? does he mind?

     

Reply

  • It strikes me that 7.30 is incredibly early for an autistic child of 11 to go to bed.

    I suggest later would be better, as your current strategy means he doesnt fall asleep for hours anyway.

    exercise in the evening might be good.

    I used to findschool so stressful, and recently university too that i would be 'wired'.

    a pleasurable activity  which also uses energy can act as a detox.so maybe a walk or a bike ride , martial arts . .swimming is especially good if he can cope with the sensory issues of a swimming pool .

    dancing to music . . something he could do with you too.

    try to use your imagination and explore his pleasures.

    as for turning lights off . . .in my opinion a potentially disastrous move.

    try not to impose things on him. he is 11 and just because he is younger than you doesn't mean that he doesnt deserve respect and tolerance as a unique human being in the same way your husband or mother does.

    He likely sees and feels the world and its challenges differently than you , and the majority , do. I never understood why people do things at certain times . . living by the clock rather than listening to the messages our bodies give us.

    perhaps reconsider his room environment. what colours are there?

    is it 'noisy'?

    perhaps you could ask him if he would like to change it . . and follow his suggestions.

    Is he eating gluten in his diet?

    playing games in the evening rather than or as well as TV. and xBox

    chess, tiddley winks whatever.

    I would suggest the looking tired etc is as likely to be a result of stress as it is lack of sleep.

    sometimes i sleep with the radio on quietly . . classical music only.

    does he sleep alone? does he mind?

     

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