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Do you think that this person is my friend or have I made them hate me now?

NAS24919
over 4 years ago

I posted to someone who I once knew from school that I was lonely at uni and that I had no friends and that people were calling me names. I felt very down and under pressure at Uni when I did, and think that this person is angry at me now. Do you think this is good advice to what I posted, or do you think this person hates me? 

He responded: First of all you need to chill. You are not a retard. The dictionary definition does not apply to you because you are social and you know how to interact with people. Only you can change your loneliness. Throw caution to the wind. Join a club/society. Ignore those who insult you - you have dealt with worse at school. If you think you have no friends then you are wrong. Look up the definition of friend in a dictionary and apply it to people you know. It s not all about uni work. You need to put yourself out there and friends will come your way. 

Do you think that this is good advice, or do you think that the person who wrote it now hates me and is angry at me? 

They initially asked me how Uni was going, and I responded inappropriately, only saying how lonely/friendless I was there. I was suffering from some depression when I responded. 


Do you think both the way I responded to their message and their response to my (in hindsight) inappropriate response (stressing my loneliness/friendlessness) has made them hate me now? We haven t spoke since. Is this good advice, or is it blunt and are they effectively saying that they hate me now?

Parents
  • over 4 years ago

     In my experience, there will always be people, whether at uni, or the world of work, who try and cope with their own pressures by putting others down. As such, you need to learn how to cope with this - I will often go for a run after work to deal with my frustrations with these people and to look after my MH in general.

    If you are lonely you need to take control of the situation by getting yourself out there e.g joining a club, applying for jobs etc.

    Your friend provided good advice. you told them you had an issue, they provided ideas on how to solve it.

Reply
  • over 4 years ago

     In my experience, there will always be people, whether at uni, or the world of work, who try and cope with their own pressures by putting others down. As such, you need to learn how to cope with this - I will often go for a run after work to deal with my frustrations with these people and to look after my MH in general.

    If you are lonely you need to take control of the situation by getting yourself out there e.g joining a club, applying for jobs etc.

    Your friend provided good advice. you told them you had an issue, they provided ideas on how to solve it.

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