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Suicide and self harm...

Dexter

Although I am frightened of dying, when the thoughts of suicide come, they can feel quite nice. To sort of get away from this madness we call life. The self harm, I do on a regular basis, and the sight of the blood running down my arm , the feel of it dripping/sliding is wonderful. I like it when it hurts cos that means I am punishing myself. However frightening death is to me, if I died right now no one would notice, and when they did they'd have a party.

Parents

  • I self harm and have made several attempts (including a number of hospital admissions). Self harm for me is a coping mechanism that staves off more drastic thoughts and is something that my cpn understands and though doesn't encourage, doesn't condemn it either.. I get the aspect of 'punishing ones self' and with respect to being frightend of death, I'd just recommend being aware of si safely (knowing where not to harm as well as deepness) and cleaning afterwards to prevent infection.

  • in reply to ToeJam

    This is what I don't understand.  Self harming and cleaning to prevent infection  !!!!

    I understand suicide, but not self harm !

  • in reply to Robert124

    For each person I can only assume it is different and done for different reasons. I have seen people who self harm without regard for how much damage it can do (and it can be crippling), I do not do that. It's a very personal thing, I don't display it or draw attention to it in real life terms... I do it because when I am finding it increasingly hard to think and process what is/has happen(ing)ed si has the effect of easing the pressure build up in my head. I am aware that the chemical release is similar to that of having a jog around the block which my depression and low mood prevents. With respect to infection prevention... why add more problems? 

    I hope I've explained it, at least from the perspective of why I do it anyway.

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  • in reply to Robert124

    For each person I can only assume it is different and done for different reasons. I have seen people who self harm without regard for how much damage it can do (and it can be crippling), I do not do that. It's a very personal thing, I don't display it or draw attention to it in real life terms... I do it because when I am finding it increasingly hard to think and process what is/has happen(ing)ed si has the effect of easing the pressure build up in my head. I am aware that the chemical release is similar to that of having a jog around the block which my depression and low mood prevents. With respect to infection prevention... why add more problems? 

    I hope I've explained it, at least from the perspective of why I do it anyway.

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