i could use some help

hi, i was diagnosed 3 weeks ago with "ASD most likely Aspergers" well it explains a lot but so far it hasn't solved any problems. im lucky, i have a partner but she's the only one that works and were moving into our flat in a couple of weeks. i feel useless. when i manage to get a job im always hated, bullied or given no hours.. i was hoping being diagnosed would be a fresh start but so far ive just sat alone depending on others. I just want a normal life. i dont want fame and fortune like media represents everyones dream, i just want a happy stable job and people that understand me. ive got no money no benefits. i keep applying and they keep closing my claim for various reasons... ive told them i has a disability and need help but there doesnt seem to be any, advice online is either aimed for struggling parents or parents/carers of individuals with low functioning autism. 

the few people ive told had no idea or the completely wrong idea of aspergers and i imagine thats why theres no help. 

i looked in the directory on this site and emailed a local service  (i live in lincoln) they basically told me my only help is there very few website articals . 

im sorry im not very good at explaining but im basically asking for some help, i feel so alone and no one understands.

please note: this is no time for me to be a charity case waiting fir a work programme, if i dont get a job ASAP Ill be homeless and lose the love of my life

  • In terms of work, what skills do you have? I understand that there are specialist employment agencies - start with the people at the benefits office and ask about specialist employment support

  • Owing to successive governments' policies you will be extremely lucky to get support. I have not received any support since my 2011 diagnosis of Asperger's. Sadly, people on the autistic spectrum are considered, at best, third-class citizens by society.

    If you approach the Job Centre (as suggested by QuirkyFriend) then you will be better off dealing with a disability employment adviser. They will have a better understanding of your needs than others at the Job Centre. With luck, the disability employment adviser will have had some autism training.

    When you get a job you will probably be entitled to reasonable adjustments, assuming you disclose your diagnosis.

    Unfortunately, I do not know how you can 'get a job ASAP'. All I can suggest is applying for suitable jobs and approaching the Job Centre.

    It will also probably take a little time to come to terms with the diagnosis.

  • Hi there,

    First off - you're not alone here.  Everyone reading this will understand.  I was diagnosed 2 years ago and I've been looking around since, but there doesn't seem to be a lot of support out there.  However, I'd say the best place to start would be your GP.  They should be able to refer you to support services if you require them.  Mine managed to get me onto a course of autism-specific CBT.  Resources vary from region to region, though. 

    I agree with QuirkyFriend and caretwo - check out local specialist employment services.  You should also, with your diagnosis, be entitled to reasonable adjustments in the workplace.  They can no longer fob you off with things like you're being too fussy, or everyone else has to put up with it.  Your diagnosis should prove to be a real positive for you in this respect - as well as its giving you explanations that you've doubtlessly long sought.

    What kinds of jobs have you had before?  Are there any that you particularly enjoyed?  Make a list of your strengths (yes, you have some!), skills and interests and make searches in specific areas.  I found the Universal Jobmatch and Indeed to be really helpful.  I found my current job - working for an autism trust - through a search on Indeed.

    Also, check out some of the resources on this site.  There's the Autism Services Directory here:


    There's also employment information here:


    and here:


    Above all - don't give up hope, and keep talking to us.  At times like this, it's easy to let the negatives build up in your head until it all becomes one big negative.  I've done it myself, and it's sometimes hard to turn around.  But you've made a big step forwards by posting here and asking for help.

    Good luck and take care,


  • Hi ,

    In terms of benefits advice, the following link will direct you to a page on the NAS website all about benefits: http://www.autism.org.uk/about/benefits-care/benefits.aspx.

    I hope this is useful to you.

    Best wishes,