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Bullying at work

shoekitten

I really don't know if I'm paranoid or I'm being bullied for real. My supervisor constantly puts a negative spin on anything I acheive at work. She mentioned my off putting personality during my monthly appraisal. One month she told me to step my game up and take charge more, the next month she accused me of being bossy. She constantly overloads me with more work than my colleagues, If I say anything she replies " well if you can't do it you're letting the team down".

I confided in her that I suspected I may have Aspergers (only because she was brow beating me about getting upset at work) I begged her not to take it further but she has now told my manager, Occupation Health and Human Resources. I'm worried sick now as I don't know how to deal with these meetings. Help...anyone?

Parents

  • This is very familiar country for me - I've had decades of this. You get runs of it, then you survive for a little respite then it starts up again. And of course you are caught up in the general debate about bullying in the work place, this happens to many people without AS, but it is infinitely worse for people on the spectrum, both because it is easier to find issues, and because of the personal anxiety caused, as you've already described. 

    I survived many such attacks simply because I kept detailed records, and I kept hanging in, because trying to find a new job is so much harder. The thing is, the person doing this, if they intend to push you out, has to make a case to management. The one blessing is that management systems are wise to personal objections and hearsay. Your boss has to provide concrete evidence not waffle, and waffle is easy to challenge. A lot of trivial might be, could be, sounds like, hints at evidence will just get your boss a bad reputation higher up the organisation (unless he she is the actual boss)

    What you mustn't do is lose your cool, or gossip to colleagues or provide any more concrete issues. And keep notes. You are being bullied. You have legal rights. Get everything down on paper including anything that gets back to you from colleague's gossiping.

    I've found Malcom Johnson 2005 "Managing with Asperger Syndrome" Jessica Kingsley Publisdhers useful even though heavy going with personal detail, because it explores the very things you are discussing.

    If you have a union talk to them. Also hasn't NAS any advice on this? This is so important, especially given the statistics about the number of people on the spectrum not in work. So when things like vthis happen, evenn if a diagnosis is unconfirmed, surely it becomes useful insight.

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  • This is very familiar country for me - I've had decades of this. You get runs of it, then you survive for a little respite then it starts up again. And of course you are caught up in the general debate about bullying in the work place, this happens to many people without AS, but it is infinitely worse for people on the spectrum, both because it is easier to find issues, and because of the personal anxiety caused, as you've already described. 

    I survived many such attacks simply because I kept detailed records, and I kept hanging in, because trying to find a new job is so much harder. The thing is, the person doing this, if they intend to push you out, has to make a case to management. The one blessing is that management systems are wise to personal objections and hearsay. Your boss has to provide concrete evidence not waffle, and waffle is easy to challenge. A lot of trivial might be, could be, sounds like, hints at evidence will just get your boss a bad reputation higher up the organisation (unless he she is the actual boss)

    What you mustn't do is lose your cool, or gossip to colleagues or provide any more concrete issues. And keep notes. You are being bullied. You have legal rights. Get everything down on paper including anything that gets back to you from colleague's gossiping.

    I've found Malcom Johnson 2005 "Managing with Asperger Syndrome" Jessica Kingsley Publisdhers useful even though heavy going with personal detail, because it explores the very things you are discussing.

    If you have a union talk to them. Also hasn't NAS any advice on this? This is so important, especially given the statistics about the number of people on the spectrum not in work. So when things like vthis happen, evenn if a diagnosis is unconfirmed, surely it becomes useful insight.

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