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Tired of miss communicating problems

NAS16724

I have aspergers and a partber of 5 years. I am finding it really diffocult since we met of not getting into arguments over the way i try and express things to.him. i will meam to say something nice to him and when i open my mouth it comes out all wrong and i end up in a big argument where i am left crying all night and tired of this happening and not wantimg to be here. I get so upset because i say things with a calm heart and im happy and expect him to say thank you or appreciate what i said but i get hated for it and into a big argument when all i wanted was to make him happy and then we are both angry. When i try and explain it is my aapergers he will tell me oh shutup its aspergers again is it and he thinks i am just being nasty but i get upset like he doesnt umderstand me or aspergers problems i just wish i could be alone forever but we have children so i cant do that i have to try and make it work so they have a family unit.

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  • Ok thank you it is wierd i do not see my partner as all them this i just think its me and my fault but when u mention it it does open my eyes and realise maybe i am not just being over sensitive maybe we both need to adjust and not just me thanks for the advise. My family have never understoood me esp my mom and i do not socialise with them because they see me as just anti social and rude because i do not see them. I like my space but maybe too much. When i told my mom about the diagnosis i said i wish we pushed for this when i was tounger so i could have got the right support and she had a go at me and said i was a good mother i tried everything i could and i jusr thought after all this time you still dont understand me and i thought why do i bother try and get that connection with family when everything just falls out of place all the time. I didnt mean anything rude by it i didnt say mom you are a bad mom or anything i just said i wish we pushed for it to get the right support sooner. It makes me not want to try and get my family to understand me as their opinions are already based on im just the way i am and for them to understand all along the problems that have occured to do with me not enjoying their birthday parties and needing my space when sharing a room with two sisters and getring stressed being on top bunk because of how bright the light was ect they will not relate it to aspergers just see it as im as my mom always called me the devils child i just egnore that i should be close to them and find it hard some days to accept i dont speak to any of them or that im not close to any of them. Other days i prefer it that way because i cant get hurt. 

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  • Ok thank you it is wierd i do not see my partner as all them this i just think its me and my fault but when u mention it it does open my eyes and realise maybe i am not just being over sensitive maybe we both need to adjust and not just me thanks for the advise. My family have never understoood me esp my mom and i do not socialise with them because they see me as just anti social and rude because i do not see them. I like my space but maybe too much. When i told my mom about the diagnosis i said i wish we pushed for this when i was tounger so i could have got the right support and she had a go at me and said i was a good mother i tried everything i could and i jusr thought after all this time you still dont understand me and i thought why do i bother try and get that connection with family when everything just falls out of place all the time. I didnt mean anything rude by it i didnt say mom you are a bad mom or anything i just said i wish we pushed for it to get the right support sooner. It makes me not want to try and get my family to understand me as their opinions are already based on im just the way i am and for them to understand all along the problems that have occured to do with me not enjoying their birthday parties and needing my space when sharing a room with two sisters and getring stressed being on top bunk because of how bright the light was ect they will not relate it to aspergers just see it as im as my mom always called me the devils child i just egnore that i should be close to them and find it hard some days to accept i dont speak to any of them or that im not close to any of them. Other days i prefer it that way because i cant get hurt. 

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