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Trying to understand?

Tryingtounderstand

Hi. I recently met my now ex partner on a dating site, we met up and the realtionship went really well, he told me he had austism which didnt bother me, it made him him! Yesterday I received a text message telling me he didnt want the relationship, i thought fine,  after 6 months i want an explation, we met up & he explained that he is still in love with me but the austism is stopping his ability to be in a relationship, we have agreed  stay friends however I need to understand? I'm hoping someone can shed some light on this situation for me? 

Thanks T

Parents

  • Honesty, loyalty, perseverance and individuality are qualities he should identify with and value, so bear this in mind. 

    Tell him how much you love him. Explain that you think it's not fair that he makes a decision that will make your life unbearable and that you cannot understand (he's likely to have a strong sense of fairness and justice). Tell him all the things you like about him, then ask him what attracted him to you.

    Remind him that although you don't have autism, you're still an individual with the ability to learn and adapt and you're trying hard to understand him, and you also have fears and anxieties (give him examples), so he needs to try to understand and help you too. Maybe asking him for help and showing that you trust him will raise his self esteem, which I think is the main issue here.

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  • Honesty, loyalty, perseverance and individuality are qualities he should identify with and value, so bear this in mind. 

    Tell him how much you love him. Explain that you think it's not fair that he makes a decision that will make your life unbearable and that you cannot understand (he's likely to have a strong sense of fairness and justice). Tell him all the things you like about him, then ask him what attracted him to you.

    Remind him that although you don't have autism, you're still an individual with the ability to learn and adapt and you're trying hard to understand him, and you also have fears and anxieties (give him examples), so he needs to try to understand and help you too. Maybe asking him for help and showing that you trust him will raise his self esteem, which I think is the main issue here.

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