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Adult ASD and purchase decisions

ovidius_n

Is it a normal ASD thing to fixate almost haplessly on whether you should buy something or not? I've been known to linger outside shops in an almost frozen state trying to figure out whether I should put money down on something that I really really really want. Once I buy the thing, though, I don't recall ever having a moment where I regretted buying it or felt too awful about it afterwards, so I doubt it's impulsive per se. In fact I usually very carefully consider everything about buying it.

I imagine this is relevant to ASD (though I don't want to jump ahead of myself) because more often than not those purchase decisions have a lot to do with things that I believe will add to things that I'm interested in — e.g. I'm currently really fixated on a Moleskine notebook and a fountain pen (within affordable limits) because I fully fully believe that they will be nice and useful for this area of knowledge that I'm learning about. However, I also live alone in London and while my finances are okay for now it's clear that my in-flow/out-flow habits aren't always the wisest, even if I'm not exactly a wastrel. 

Do people share similar experiences, and does anyone have any tips or ways of coping with that strong sense of fixation when it hits? 

  • I think that the problems about making decissions on purchases are exacerbated by low income. If your spending power is restricted, like mine is, you just don't want to make a mistake, especially on big items. 

    Clothing wise, I think charity shops have a lot to offer, because you can find really niceitems at low prices and if it turns out that you are not so keen, then you havn't wasted much money.

    I agree about breakfast too. Same every day, makes life easy. I only have to think about 2 meals and can often push the choice on to my husband.

  • I have difficulty making decisions. It's not just making purchases, though that is difficult too. Pre-internet access I used to go to numerous shops and see what they had. Sometimes I would then go back to the shop with the item I had chosen on the day, but sometimes I couldn't decide or would run out of time and so I would need to go back another day. Now I tend to look on the internet for the ins and outs of products.

    There are some things which I find impossible to decide, but may eventually do so through necessity - such as a recent need to find a trades person to do some work in my home. Thankfully I identified someone through a channel that presented me with limited options, of which only one person responded so I chose them. I am conscious that it may not be the best decision, but try to be kind to myself in acknowledging that I am actually doing something which I found extremely difficult (actually impossible until the work became essential).

    For breakfast I have the same thing each day. I think that is probably do that I don't have to think and make a decision 1) every morning about what to eat and 2) each shopping trip about what to buy, comparing the prices, balancing that against flavour and quality. I have to just make a decision because I have ended up getting tired, hungry and overwhelmed when food shopping.

    So yes, I find this difficulty making decisions applies to one off purchases of bigger or more expensive items, as well as many other aspects of life.

  • Thanks for posting this, I can really relate to this and has been posing a big problem for me over past decade. It causes a lot of stress, and I have to research everything about it. Even technical things like computers, phones, etc, being professional web developer, I am very technically inclined. 

    Many years ago I didn't buy much stuff, even after I had moved in to a new house. I was much happier with minimal possessions, but take great care and get a lot of use out of possessions you own.

    Recently I have wanted to upgrade my hi-fi, problem has been finding a decent set of speakers. I just don't like the modern ones, but there are a few produced mainly in 80s I would like. Have been looking second hand, difficult to find, but a couple of really good ones came up, and I have to ask all the details, and by the time I have decided to go for them, someone else has bought them.

    With computers, phones, and technical things, I don't follow latest trend, usually going for something that's going out of fashion. Choices are more limited, cheaper, and established, so problems are well known.

    Sorry, probably haven't helped, but thought I would post 

    Paul

  • Oh yes I can go months prevaracating over a simple purchase. Really annoys my parents.

  • Hi Ovidius n,

    I can relate to your experiences - before I buy any product I have to do the research about ALL the good and bad points related to a purchase, and will take as long as it takes to feel "comfortable" with buying that product.  What I find helpful, and which might work for you, is just listing the good and bad points (plus and minus) on a sheet of paper. Seeing them written down seems to help the mind to focus on them.  Obviously this involves going home and writing the good and bad points down on paper, rather than just going ahead and buying the product. 

    I know it probably sounds obvious to do a plus/minus exercise, but for me it's really worked - on more than one occasion I've done exactly the opposite of my original intention, and been happier with the decision!  I've always been a financially prudent person, so I think it's just part of my character to always check everything out before I make a final decision.  Like yourself, I too don't ever recall having regretted taken a decision having used this method, and as you say, you're very careful before buying things.

    I don't know if that helps at all, but it might be worth a try - it works for me.  I tend to have big problems processing things in my mind, and seeing it written down is a great help.