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I think if you enjoy time with the escorts and no one gets hurt, then why not? I too need a lot of time to myself but also get lonely. It is hard to find a balance.
i am not sure if you like animals, but they make wonderful companions to keep you company but you don't have to feel pressured to give up all of your time to spend with them. I recently got a dog and have found that i am so happy having a non human, non verbal yet loving companion. And taking him for walks provides brief but friendly interaction with other dog owners.
You shouldn't feel pressured or made to feel odd if you don't want a full time partner in life. Having friends (animal or human) can be enough for some of us. Find what makes you happy and embrace it.
It won't be the last time that I say or write something that isn't received well - all part and parcel of the ASD really - so I'm sorry if that has caught a nerve.
Have a look at...
en.wikipedia.org/.../Propinquity
Perhaps, now that you have moved on from desparate need you might relax and be more likely to find a partner?
HTH
Hi Dan,
I read your post with interest and commend you on your honesty.
I'm NT (apologies for that) who is in a relationship with a wonderful AS man. We met online through a dating site, and what fascinated me about his profile was his honesty and obvious integrity (he hadn't been diagnosed at this stage). I wasn't really looking for a relationship, I was lonely and in need of local friends and didn't know where to find any!! We subsequently clicked and have built a successful relationship - not without it's challenges. It can be done, I think our initial success was that we weren't expecting too much from each other at the first meeting.
As for your relationships with escort ladies, good for you, if this works and keeps you from loneliness, then carry on. I've always considered a professional escort, professional being the key word here, as someone who plays a very important role in Society and shouldn't be treated shoddily. The fact that some of them are seeking to meet with you off the clock confirms that they find you a good person and obviously enjoy your company.
Dating can be an expensive business, (I'm content with a pint of bitter and bag of chips!) and the right woman will be delighted with whatever you can offer as it's your company they should be interested in - not what you can financially afford.
I hope that the day may come when the right person appears in your life and you can build a good relationship, in the meantime, I applaud your honesty, carry on, you are hurting no-one and looking after yourself and your emotional well being.
Good luck.
If it works for you and since nobody is getting hurt then I don't see that there is a problem.
Other solutions are available.
Many relationships work on the basis that there is time together and time alone. Some men (and women) spend a lot fo time in their sheds (or on their hobbies, gardening, computing, fishing etc etc) which is actually equivalent to time alone to think, time to do what you want.
I think that one of the reasons that your solution works is that you aren't afraid of failure. You each get what you expect and therefore you are free of the "pressure to perform" that a date situation creates. Personally I found dating difficult and met people more slowly through social events where you had the opportunity to meet but no expectation that you would make a decision or get hooked up. if you get to know someone over a period of time then you can relax more and allow each other to see each other's strengths and weaknesses.
