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overthinking

asparagus

Hello

I call it this because once I heard it on TV a very long time ago and it sounded as though it something I do actually do and when Apserger's was mooted to me a few year ago and was diagnosed last year with Autism. This is one of the areas where I say to someone I trust I hate autism. 

Tell me something serious, I blink but take it well. Tell me off, quite properly, for something so small I can overthink it. About a month ago I realised the change from knowing it autism to how would have handled it in the past. In the past, if that person had told me off, I would have possibly walked out on her, gone home and not shown up for a few weeks and chuntered to it for myself lasting for about six weeks. This incident I was able to go and seek help elsewhere and a gentle chat about it that moved into relatively normal conversation and went home okay about it as such.

This weekend I had a really good conversation with someone on Friday. In that conversation he pointed out so calmly, I think about comments way to much. Hmm part of my overthinking. The rest of the conversation including that went well. Friday evening was okay. By Saturday though I had remembered he had said this one bit. Of which I knew because I tell 'him' I overthink, and he will know from my contact with him it something I do. So how come I managed to overthink the overthinking.  I didn't argue back or anything at the time. I just nodded because I know I do so.

The comments I end up overthinking, I don't choose them. They can be good comments and I have to go around and around wondering what they might actaully mean. Why did he say it so kind? Or it can be a negative comment in my mind and chunter about it around and around. This person is my support so at least I can offload in my way to them and did so through the whole weekend.  Good things happened in that conversation but somehow my brain not focusing on that. I nearly recovered as such.

But does anyone else have overthinking comments? Can you actually choose what you overthink. This morning he did make a very helpful suggestion in if am going to overthink then choose to think on.... but is it as easy as that?  In the email I sent I know I had done exactly what he told me I do. Take a comment and way over think it. So why I did so when I know I do so. He wasn't correcting me or anything. 

But how do you deal with overthinking.

Parents

  • Keep a notebook, one that fits in a pocket. Write things down that puzzle you on one side of the page. Do some spider diagrams or whatever you find useful on the page opposite or refer to back pages. Use this to analyse issues on paper.

    Getting stuff down on paper can reduce the inclination towards anxiety spirals and analysis. It means some of the stuff is on paper where you know it is. It may take time before it reduces the amount of thinking through, but keep up the habit. I kept notebooks for decades, writing down some right strange stuff looking back, but it freed up mental processing.

    You can also reduce worry cycles by means of an interrupt. Flick your ear, or snap an elastic band on your wrist, just enough to break the train of thought for a few minutes. In time replace it with a word or phrase that has the same effect. When I'm cogitating too much a voice in my head says I've had enough of this. It stops....for a while.

Reply

  • Keep a notebook, one that fits in a pocket. Write things down that puzzle you on one side of the page. Do some spider diagrams or whatever you find useful on the page opposite or refer to back pages. Use this to analyse issues on paper.

    Getting stuff down on paper can reduce the inclination towards anxiety spirals and analysis. It means some of the stuff is on paper where you know it is. It may take time before it reduces the amount of thinking through, but keep up the habit. I kept notebooks for decades, writing down some right strange stuff looking back, but it freed up mental processing.

    You can also reduce worry cycles by means of an interrupt. Flick your ear, or snap an elastic band on your wrist, just enough to break the train of thought for a few minutes. In time replace it with a word or phrase that has the same effect. When I'm cogitating too much a voice in my head says I've had enough of this. It stops....for a while.

Children
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