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Knowing that I'm different.

ethan01

I've had a diagnosis of autism since 7 years old. but never thought much of it. But as shortly completing my final year of school, i'm starting to think to myself, why am I different?

I go to school every day, with not one friend.

I think differently than others

I got high expectation in life, but strugle to see how to achieve them.

I dont think my family really understand on what I'm feeling and what I'm trying to say, if i do something wrong, my grandmother screams at me and shouts. Just makes me not to like her even more.

Life with autism is not easy, but as I get older, I'm starting to wonder, why? why me?

I'm finding hard to talk to my parents about stuff, because, strange things worry me, and when I try to talk to them about it, they just tell me to grow up, get a life. Things like that upset me. But, I love my family to bits, but sometimes, I dont think they understand on what autism actually is.

Is anyone else that has autism knows that they are different, but just dont know how?

 

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Ethan,

    Autism, or Aspergers is a curse but it can also be a gift. It brings problems but also special talents.

    If everybody was the same then there is a danger that lemming, or at least sheep- like behaviour would happen. Perhaps we can think of ourselves as anti-lemmings? We often have different ideas, can't stop ourselves from spekaing out, but often don't understand the things that other people understand etc etc. i.e. it isn't just all bad - there are good bits and bad bits.

    You ask "why me?" It didn't happen for a reason. You weren't chosen for this but a lot of it is down to the lottery that happens in genetics. you are likely to have inherited things from a parent(or 2) and grandparent(s). You are not the only one with these tendencies and you might be able to spot some difficulties or awkwardnesses in your family. It isn't as unusual as you might think. Don't look for blame though, they have no more responsibility (i.e. none) than you have for your condition.

    School can be a mixed experience for many people with autism. Many get bullied and have a bad time but school is an artificial environment that is often unlike work. Work is often done with a much smaller set of colleagues who may have similar interests.

    You are finding it difficult to talk to people. Some of this is down to your autism but some of it is just normal for a teenager. As you get older you will understand more about what your parents or grandparents are thinking and you will develop better ways of talking to them.

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Ethan,

    Autism, or Aspergers is a curse but it can also be a gift. It brings problems but also special talents.

    If everybody was the same then there is a danger that lemming, or at least sheep- like behaviour would happen. Perhaps we can think of ourselves as anti-lemmings? We often have different ideas, can't stop ourselves from spekaing out, but often don't understand the things that other people understand etc etc. i.e. it isn't just all bad - there are good bits and bad bits.

    You ask "why me?" It didn't happen for a reason. You weren't chosen for this but a lot of it is down to the lottery that happens in genetics. you are likely to have inherited things from a parent(or 2) and grandparent(s). You are not the only one with these tendencies and you might be able to spot some difficulties or awkwardnesses in your family. It isn't as unusual as you might think. Don't look for blame though, they have no more responsibility (i.e. none) than you have for your condition.

    School can be a mixed experience for many people with autism. Many get bullied and have a bad time but school is an artificial environment that is often unlike work. Work is often done with a much smaller set of colleagues who may have similar interests.

    You are finding it difficult to talk to people. Some of this is down to your autism but some of it is just normal for a teenager. As you get older you will understand more about what your parents or grandparents are thinking and you will develop better ways of talking to them.

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