Why do Neurotypicals constantly dumb down Asperger traits?

Because every single Asperger trait in isolation, from poor eye contact to obsessive interests to social fatigue, can occur in the NT population, people often say things like 'oh, my friend finds social situations tiring after about half an hour',intending to be nice but actually conveying a lack of true understanding. It feels like they are invalidating my experience, which is profoundly more significant than mere social fatigue!. It is like they are trying to say 'just pull yourself together, try harder and  things will be fine', or that 'you are making too much of a fuss, even NTs struggle sometimes with social situations'. Yes, this is true, but really beside the point. It is a bit like saying to someone with ME, 'even people without ME feel really tired and run down sometimes'.

Why is this acceptable when talking about Asperger's?

Parents
  • Hi,

    I get seriously tired,more than most,having people contact, like you,it is such hard work,trying to figure everything out. I think with those people saying that,are trying to relate to you-but the best thing to remember,Is not even n.t's are a people person,not all n.t's possess all the people skills in the world.They are probably just trying to make conversation,and even n.it's can make daft/trite comments. The pressure of the moment to come up with something'possitive'' ends up offending.

Reply
  • Hi,

    I get seriously tired,more than most,having people contact, like you,it is such hard work,trying to figure everything out. I think with those people saying that,are trying to relate to you-but the best thing to remember,Is not even n.t's are a people person,not all n.t's possess all the people skills in the world.They are probably just trying to make conversation,and even n.it's can make daft/trite comments. The pressure of the moment to come up with something'possitive'' ends up offending.

Children
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