help please newly diagnosed and behavioural issues

Could do with a bit help been newly diagnosed as on the spectrum and life is a strugle atm feels like walking on egg shells half the time to stop full blown arguments and bursts of aggressive behaviour my son is so argumentitive and has to be right wont be wrong and if u dare argue thats when name calling punching kicking biteing head banging beginns. From the moment he gets up hes argueing with sibleings ect but at school no behaviour shown. Yet at home its a diffrent story. Going to bed  is an aguement and if i dare say anything he has to be right again getting in ur face spoke to schòol and they make u feel like a lier and ur  makeing it up c.h.a.ms wont take him on as he dont fit critere is it just me parenting coz thats how im starting to feel.

Parents
  • Can I ask? This may seem a little odd as a question, but are you sure your son has a full understanding of what he is doing to you?

    The reason I ask, is because I read a book by Valerie Gaus recently, where she describes been repeatedly assaulted by a child with Autism that she was supporting. This child regularly spat at her I believe. One day, she spat back at the child and to her amazment the child protested that it was unpleasent for them. When she explained that it was unpleasent to have it done to her also, the child never spat again. It turned out that the child had no concept that what he/she was doing, was unpleasent. Only when they became aware did they alter their behaviour.

    Obviously you need to be careful here. I'm not suggesting that you adopt tit for tat fight behaviour toward your son, but it may well be worth looking into CBT or other support for your childs issues. Does your son receive DLA? If so, are you able to channel that into some private therapy from an autism aware therapist? I had to do this for one of my sons to help with his behavioral issues and in fact it was way more helpful than CHAM's who could only offer around 6 sessions.

    Their is a link on this site re behavioral issues, but you may prefer to call the NAS helpline for advice.

    Thinking of you,

    Coogybear.

Reply
  • Can I ask? This may seem a little odd as a question, but are you sure your son has a full understanding of what he is doing to you?

    The reason I ask, is because I read a book by Valerie Gaus recently, where she describes been repeatedly assaulted by a child with Autism that she was supporting. This child regularly spat at her I believe. One day, she spat back at the child and to her amazment the child protested that it was unpleasent for them. When she explained that it was unpleasent to have it done to her also, the child never spat again. It turned out that the child had no concept that what he/she was doing, was unpleasent. Only when they became aware did they alter their behaviour.

    Obviously you need to be careful here. I'm not suggesting that you adopt tit for tat fight behaviour toward your son, but it may well be worth looking into CBT or other support for your childs issues. Does your son receive DLA? If so, are you able to channel that into some private therapy from an autism aware therapist? I had to do this for one of my sons to help with his behavioral issues and in fact it was way more helpful than CHAM's who could only offer around 6 sessions.

    Their is a link on this site re behavioral issues, but you may prefer to call the NAS helpline for advice.

    Thinking of you,

    Coogybear.

Children
No Data