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feeling like a bad person

Lydia

does else worry about being a bad person? I try really hard to be a good person but I only ever seem to make everyone I love unhappy due to my unreasonable demands for attention, patience, reassurance and support. By people, I mean more specifically my parents. I am twenty but I rely totally on them for almost everything. I am like a child in how much I need them. It doesn't help that along with my Asperger's, I have a long standing history of anorexia. This means that I basically rely on them to feed me and reassure me about the food and myself.

I am basically a drain. I take and never give.

I also think that I will never have a family of my own, even though I really want one. First, I have no idea how relationships work. Second, I am such a waste of space that no one would ever be able to love me who didn't already have some kind of obligation to do so (like my parents do)

anyway, sorry for being miserable and dramatic. Just feeling down.

also, sorry for not replying to people's posts here for a while. That's another thing which I worry makes me a bad, selfish person.

sorry.

Parents

  • I felt that I was extremely selfish when growing up, but it diminished and I discovered the true meaning of putting others first when I had a child, at 30.

    I really cared about my parents feelings, but did not think it humanly posible to put another persons need before my own. I was very slow to mature, but got there in the end. Tania Marshal describes on her website, delayed maturity as a trait of asd, in females.

    I felt guilty about it too, but now having had children, I also know that parents put their childrens needs high on their agenda, and will love and support you for as long as it takes for you to reach that moment when you find you need your independance.

    You will mature in your own good time, so enjoy this wonderfully supportive relationship you have with your parents. And do remember that many parents dread the moment when their child grows up and leaves, it's known as "empty nest syndrome". You are perhaps fulfilling a need in them, to have someone to "mother".

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  • I felt that I was extremely selfish when growing up, but it diminished and I discovered the true meaning of putting others first when I had a child, at 30.

    I really cared about my parents feelings, but did not think it humanly posible to put another persons need before my own. I was very slow to mature, but got there in the end. Tania Marshal describes on her website, delayed maturity as a trait of asd, in females.

    I felt guilty about it too, but now having had children, I also know that parents put their childrens needs high on their agenda, and will love and support you for as long as it takes for you to reach that moment when you find you need your independance.

    You will mature in your own good time, so enjoy this wonderfully supportive relationship you have with your parents. And do remember that many parents dread the moment when their child grows up and leaves, it's known as "empty nest syndrome". You are perhaps fulfilling a need in them, to have someone to "mother".

Children
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