Think happier thoughts

Moving on from cbt, we can take control of our own thoughts with practice.

If you think of a series of thoughts in terms of making a candle by the dipping method, then each time you think a particular series of thoughts, you dip your string in wax and let it dry. It becomes thicker each time and if your thoughts follow common routes, then what was once a narrow path can become a main road and one you use most often.

 You need to turn off and find a pleasant back road and make that your chosen route instead.

When you feel down, your mouth turns down, and you see yourself as a sad person, literally if you look in a mirror. So step 1 can be to smile whenever you see your reflection. You may not want to, but put yourself in personal boot camp and make it compulsory, it will change the way you see yourself eventually.

Step 2 is to lift your head when out and look at/watch the world around you. I play games everywhere I go. When outside I look at buildings and pick the ones I like and the "carbuncles", everywhere has good and bad architecture. Look up the ones you like, acquire some knowledge.

My other favourite game is the "buy a gift for someone" game. You don't buy it, just choose something, in every shop. So  pick a person you know, not necessarily someone you like and choose a suitable gift. You can choose with love or hate in mind. So if you like a person select a nice piece of furnature  or a food item etc. I have a great time in touristy gift shops on holiday looking at all those plaques with messages on and thinking who I would present them to. Some are quite pithy.

You may think this sounds a bit odd, but it will take you off the negative highway onto the happier distracting back road. You can get other people to join in. My husband and I go round National Trust houses picking something to take home from every room.

The key thing , is to force yourself to do it when your head is full of poison, and find the game that amuses you. It works for me.

I

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  • Rsocks is right here. I'm not suggesting this cures asd. I have loads of issues with people and situations around socialising, particularly noise, both background and loud noise and bright light etc.

    The thing is, that I am not currently depressed about it. I'm coping because these issues are normal for me and I have to deal with them as best I can from day to day. I have had to, in complete ignorance, for most of my life.

    Depression and anxiety are not normal, they are illness. they are not caused by asd. Many things we experience as a result of asd may contribute to illness, but many things nt people experience cause illness too. The things that made me depressed mounted gradually and included bereavement and a car accident. Those were not caused by asd. Low level bullying and lack of friends didn't help and contributed to the depression.

    Mental illness strikes around a quarter of the population at some point, asd does not.

    I think that if you see asd as being a major factor in mental illness, then you may close your mind to the posibilities for improvement, even more than nt people do. It is the nature of depression to believe that you can't get better.

    You can recover from mental illness if you open your mind to that possibility. I have.

    Asd, you cannot change, only learn to cope as best you can. People on the spectrum can lead happy fulfilled lives and use the advantages of the condition and try to avoid the disadvantages. The danger is to say nothing works for me, because it was not designed for me.

    If you were hungry, and there was a loaf of bread, buried 2 feet down in soil, you may think,"I need a spade". What I am saying is, look around you, if all you can find is a fork, you would use it. It may take much longer to achieve the result you want, but you would not say "this implement is unsuitable, so I won't use it". You would not choose to starve. If you are ill, and you have the will to live, you use whatever resources are available. It is survival instinct, self preservation.

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  • Rsocks is right here. I'm not suggesting this cures asd. I have loads of issues with people and situations around socialising, particularly noise, both background and loud noise and bright light etc.

    The thing is, that I am not currently depressed about it. I'm coping because these issues are normal for me and I have to deal with them as best I can from day to day. I have had to, in complete ignorance, for most of my life.

    Depression and anxiety are not normal, they are illness. they are not caused by asd. Many things we experience as a result of asd may contribute to illness, but many things nt people experience cause illness too. The things that made me depressed mounted gradually and included bereavement and a car accident. Those were not caused by asd. Low level bullying and lack of friends didn't help and contributed to the depression.

    Mental illness strikes around a quarter of the population at some point, asd does not.

    I think that if you see asd as being a major factor in mental illness, then you may close your mind to the posibilities for improvement, even more than nt people do. It is the nature of depression to believe that you can't get better.

    You can recover from mental illness if you open your mind to that possibility. I have.

    Asd, you cannot change, only learn to cope as best you can. People on the spectrum can lead happy fulfilled lives and use the advantages of the condition and try to avoid the disadvantages. The danger is to say nothing works for me, because it was not designed for me.

    If you were hungry, and there was a loaf of bread, buried 2 feet down in soil, you may think,"I need a spade". What I am saying is, look around you, if all you can find is a fork, you would use it. It may take much longer to achieve the result you want, but you would not say "this implement is unsuitable, so I won't use it". You would not choose to starve. If you are ill, and you have the will to live, you use whatever resources are available. It is survival instinct, self preservation.

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