Think happier thoughts

Moving on from cbt, we can take control of our own thoughts with practice.

If you think of a series of thoughts in terms of making a candle by the dipping method, then each time you think a particular series of thoughts, you dip your string in wax and let it dry. It becomes thicker each time and if your thoughts follow common routes, then what was once a narrow path can become a main road and one you use most often.

 You need to turn off and find a pleasant back road and make that your chosen route instead.

When you feel down, your mouth turns down, and you see yourself as a sad person, literally if you look in a mirror. So step 1 can be to smile whenever you see your reflection. You may not want to, but put yourself in personal boot camp and make it compulsory, it will change the way you see yourself eventually.

Step 2 is to lift your head when out and look at/watch the world around you. I play games everywhere I go. When outside I look at buildings and pick the ones I like and the "carbuncles", everywhere has good and bad architecture. Look up the ones you like, acquire some knowledge.

My other favourite game is the "buy a gift for someone" game. You don't buy it, just choose something, in every shop. So  pick a person you know, not necessarily someone you like and choose a suitable gift. You can choose with love or hate in mind. So if you like a person select a nice piece of furnature  or a food item etc. I have a great time in touristy gift shops on holiday looking at all those plaques with messages on and thinking who I would present them to. Some are quite pithy.

You may think this sounds a bit odd, but it will take you off the negative highway onto the happier distracting back road. You can get other people to join in. My husband and I go round National Trust houses picking something to take home from every room.

The key thing , is to force yourself to do it when your head is full of poison, and find the game that amuses you. It works for me.

I

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  • Hi Marjorie195, just leaving aside for the moment whether people on the spectrum could make these changes, and how you suggest they go about it......Autism is not a mental illness.

    Autism describes a complex of interrelated and interacting difficulties. Despite a vast published resource on autism, there still isn't much out there that gets down to the detailed "nuts and bolts" of how autism impacts on daily lives. There is still a lot that is unknown.

    Yes you can do various mental exercises to push your boundaries, find different ways forward, help you adapt and cope better, and many people do develop coping strategies which improve their lifestyle. Many others cannot, because there are just too many conflicting factors preventing them from finding meaningful coping strategies.

    With autism, there are so many contributing factors those strategies can be overwhelmed and undermined. Also it is difficult to find strategies that resolve or even alleviate some aspects. There is too much involved for any individual to understand and get to grips with. People were born with the condition. They've had it from the start (even if not diagnosed until much later), and haven't known anything else.

    So...... people on the spectrum would need help to be able to do this. Where is the help? OK there are therapists out there, some free services, some charging, some charging a lot. And if you read the postings on here, a common problem is you can find therapists, but way too few of them understand autism. You just get generalists for whom autism is just ....oooo that looks fun...  maybe my homespun therapy cures will work for autism......

    But the other side to this is your original candle wick analogy, and your elaboration about neural pathways that can change from back ways to motorways. You seem to be saying (as some people do, including some professionals) that all autism is is a failure to develop (maybe we weren't paying attention when our peers learned life skills), and all we have to do is re-activate the forgotten neural pathways and we are cured.

    It is just not the case. It is a very complicated condition. As of this time it isn't curable. There's no magic wand.  

  • "Autism describes a complex of interrelated and interacting difficulties. Despite a vast published resource on autism, there still isn't much out there that gets down to the detailed "nuts and bolts" of how autism impacts on daily lives. There is still a lot that is unknown."

    This is because all the information out there on autism is misinformation.  any useful information is still in the research stages.

    "It is just not the case. It is a very complicated condition. As of this time it isn't curable. There's no magic wand." 

    And it is just that "a very complicated condition" that's why it's classed as a disability not an "illness" and rightly so.

Reply
  • "Autism describes a complex of interrelated and interacting difficulties. Despite a vast published resource on autism, there still isn't much out there that gets down to the detailed "nuts and bolts" of how autism impacts on daily lives. There is still a lot that is unknown."

    This is because all the information out there on autism is misinformation.  any useful information is still in the research stages.

    "It is just not the case. It is a very complicated condition. As of this time it isn't curable. There's no magic wand." 

    And it is just that "a very complicated condition" that's why it's classed as a disability not an "illness" and rightly so.

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