It seems we're niether fish nor fowl?

I find the concept of autism being a disorder rather inimical, as we strive unusually hard to give order to our lives and surroundings. If anyone has all their ducks in a row it is the autistics, ordered by size and or colour!

The word 'disorder' is really the attempt by the clinical world to cope with the US medical insurance industry (or insurance scam); the inclusion of this word ensures that autists, or people who have autistic children, get access to funding for therapies or other forms of support. It seems to have been exported to the rest of the world.

I think that the social model of disability could render the word 'disorder' redundant, if clinicians were to adopt it in its fullest sense. If the environment, social or physical, creates disabling conditions for autists, then it follows that we do not need to be labelled as 'disordered' in order to be disabled. 

My gut reaction was to say yes, I have a disorder because it has so F--d up my life,  but then again, at lot of my issues were caused by the way

others including parents treated me, and a lot my issues were not directly due to having an ASC, but were due to low self esteem, and unhelpful

habits like alcohol abuse, that were both in reaction to how I was treated by others, and to my difficulty with coping with a neurotypical world.

I think it’s important to retain Disorder. Autism to me is a disability. I am disordered. I am broken and definitely dysregulated and dysfunctional. I have moderate support needs and don’t leave the house, currently in full Autistic Burnout, the sort where no one can give you a time frame as to when or if things might improve. When I was younger and worked behind the scenes my life was chaos as I tried to hold it together but in truth was increasingly dependent on alcohol and other maladaptive coping strategies. My husband does everything for me.

My children were diagnosed at Primary school and they have a disability which affects their ability to do things and they need constant support. I remember in 2013 they tried to diagnose my eldest with Austism Spectrum Condition but he got increasingly worse behaviourally and was put into a specialist unit for 5 years. It just became Autism. 

I don’t think we can just say Autism is a different way of functioning. I think we have to retain an aspect that Autism makes life more difficult. For me it is a major disability I wish I had never been born with. I can’t imagine thinking about it in a different way. My own children don’t plan to have children because they see how heritable this disorder is. My eldest struggles and self harms. They take a number of medications. They hate being Autistic and, like me would change it if they could. 

If Autism is just a different way of doing things with no deficit, no issues, no maladaptive behaviour, no sensory meltdowns, no restricted diet, no anxiety, no demand avoidance then is it really Autism? In a world where we’re increasingly struggling to get help  support, any sort of recognition from the medical profession, the last thing we need is to soften terms down. 

I couldn’t quite believe it was true at first. 

I think people, autistic or not, deserve respect as human beings, but I’m all for highlighting their abusive, misogynistic or less than respectful attitudes and behaviours. It wasn’t so long ago that many women were given a diagnosis of hysteria and it was considered a physical illness. Given that the diagnosis was removed from the DSM only in 1980, a change of terminology around autism, and misogynistic foreign terminology of women’s physiology, will be a slow process. 

ArchaeC said:

'Make women feel seen': Why the Dutch have a new word for labia https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cn4klprmr0go

Thank you for sharing that article, very interesting read.

I was thinking that if a woman was angry or upset and told by a man it was "because she was on the rag", it would be classed as misogynistic and would be a disciplinary offence in most workplaces, and yet it seems OK for an autistic person who's angry or upset that they're disregulating. Both terms are used as acts of power and to delegitimise another persons feeling and sense of agency as well as doing nothing to accept that they might be the cause of the anger and upset.

I agree with you about the term disorder too, we're not disordered, we may need a bit of back up from time to time, but who dosen't? There are something's I find really difficult, others I don't understand, some I dont' enjoy, sometimes I just feel like crap and niether brain or body want to work properly, is this a disorder or just normal life?

I think as a group of people we need to start taking our power back from those who would deny us and come up with socially and medically insulting terms to describe us. If they're "normal" and "ordered" people, then why on earth would we want to be like them anyway? 

Roy said:

I find some of the notice boards on the London Underground quite interesting, the one below brought a smile to my face.

Nice! 

I dislike the word ‘disorder’ to describe the condition of autism.

The Chambers Dictionary lists four distinct meanings for ‘disorder’:

1. Lack of order
2. Confusion
3. Disturbance among the public, breach of the peace, crowd violence, rioting, etc
4. A malfunction of the body, an ailment or illness.

The fourth definition appears to be where the categorisation of autism lies. Autism isn’t an ailment or an illness, so it seems that it’s ‘a malfunction of the body’.

I don’t feel disordered, yet my functioning isn’t like the majority of the population, but I don’t feel it’s dysfunctional - I just go about achieving what I want to do in a way unlike the majority of people. Sometimes I can’t do what I want or need to do and I suppose that means I’m not functioning as well as I would like, but it’s not all the time so I don’t see why I should be classified as having a disorder when it doesn’t affect me all the time. I shouldn’t be defined as ‘disordered’. I may be autistic 24 hours per day but my functioning depends largely on many and varied circumstances of no fixed severity or timing.

Some of those who came up with the idea of autism being a ‘disorder’ could fit the second definition. 

TheCatWoman said:

I think society as a whole is starting to realise that there are many more ways of being human than previously realised, it dosen't manifest in skin colour, facial features or other visable signs, but WE LOOK LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, people might not know who they're sitting next to on the bus!

I do agree and it has reminded me of this article about shaming women’s body parts. What chance have women got of being treated with respect when such ‘official terminology’ is bandied about? 

'Make women feel seen': Why the Dutch have a new word for labia https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cn4klprmr0go

I think the largely male body of people who write and edit medical literature such as the DSM and European equivalent etc., should evaluate and rename many things. 

You're alright Alexa, this is the sort of response I was hoping for, among others, I agree that NT's do need a lot of reassurance that they're normal, they're easily frightened, imagine what it must be like to live like that and have all that fear of being different! NT men need to have their male privilidge and sexual prowess acknowleged several times a day, whilst NT women seem to accept this as normal and are willing to put themselves down in order to please the NT male. NT females seem to have a desperate need to compete with other females over social adornments and wanting to be the same size, shape and colours as each other, but with an individual twist, such as a single adornment like a piece of jewelry. Social adornments like jewelry are really important to the NT female and they will flock together making pleased squealing noises over the one who has gained the approval of a male and he has bought her a diamond to place on the third finger of her let hand in what appears to be the promise of an ownership ritual at a later date. This ritual demands the female to deny herself adaquate food for many months so as she can fit into "the dress", this is an expensive piece of clothing that will never be worn again as it's impracticle for anything but standing around in, she will be attended by a small flock of equally excited and impractically dressed females. The males will hire clothing that was fashionable in a bygone era, and consume lots of alchol and even go on a short holiday to do so, many will be ritually humiliated too.

They will then go to a special place to complete the ownership ritual where they exchange terms of ownership, these are called vows, they then sign a book and get a reciept for each other. The female then frequently changes her last name to his, to show that she now belongs to him, it's often not obvious how he belongs to her however even after the exchange of more jewelry as part of the ownership ritual as the males aren't required to wear metal signs of ownership.

Apart from black humour, I was hoping to start a discussion on the words used about us, how we're diagnosed and disempowered or empowered and our feelings used against us?

TheCatWoman said:

I see these same sort of panics being caused by the increasing number of people being diagnosed with ND

I think the main symptom of the NT disorder is a dysfunctional need for everyone to be the same as themselves. They are poor are dealing with changes from the way they believe people should act or look and often experience high support needs in terms of being assured they are right, sometimes many times a day. 

Of course, some NTs manage life with less support and can even approach ND levels of social acceptance.

(Sorry, your post triggered my black humour, TheCatWoman) 

Roy said:

I find the word disorder offensive

Me too.

TheCatWoman said:

words like "disorder" are wrong and unhelpful.

I agree

I also dislike the term "diagnosis" for determining that one is on the spectrum, as it's a medical term. One reason why I won't go for one.

Everyone is different, ND or NT, everyone has different needs. There should be more awareness of this, and more done to accommodate differing needs.

I find the word disorder offensive, the DSM-5 is the manual for diagnosing mental disorders, the word sounds like we belong in a Victorian asylum. 

Autism Spectrum Disorder, I find the word condition better than disorder, but it’s still sounds like a disease. We tend to be some of the most orderly people. Divergent simply means to do something from a different direction or perspective, there is little disorder in that. 
Yes we can get dysregulated but its normally when an environment that’s not ours is forced upon us. An  animal kept in the wrong environment will struggle, it’s not their natural environment.

I find some of the notice boards on the London Underground quite interesting, the one below brought a smile to my face.