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Autistic self care

B

I've thought about this for a while but having done a search, I see that the subject is even more complex than I first thought:

Here is a link on the subject to Autism Central, an NHS site:

https://www.autismcentral.nhs.uk/guidance/personal-care

There is some useful information here too (a PDF document):

https://ausm.org/wp-content/uploads/2025/07/Self-Care-Toolkit-for-Autistic-People.pdf

I think I've neglected most of the areas mentioned but one thing that particularly strikes me as a woman is not paying for services eg. some people pay to have hair removed, nails painted, go to beauticians, saunas etc.

I have never done this and it's as much as I can do quite often to cut my nails.

One of the reasons for me has been exhaustion from being overwhelmed by life.

I think there must be lots of reasons behind this but they all come down to the same thing: self neglect.

Do you feel that you neglect yourself or do you feel that your self care is good - physical, mental, spiritual etc etc?

Parents

  • I have previously neglected my wellbeing by putting work and other people's needs before my own since childhood. Since my diagnosis last year, I have consciously aimed to improve on this but I am still 'in training' as a recovering people pleaser.

  • in reply to leveller61
    leveller61 said:
    recovering people pleaser.

    I like that term.

    I'm not sure I've got that far to be 'in recovery' but it has been a major issue for me too in my life to the degree that I have seriously compromised my life.

    I suspect that can be quite common with autism.

  • in reply to B

    I think so, B. We tend to try hard to fit in so we are liked rather than bullied or otherwise othered. This can lead a person to think their worth is contingent on some level of behaviour or attainment rather than being loved unconditionally and being enough just as they/we are.

    I adopted the phrase 'recovering people pleaser' from Natalie Lue, whose book 'The Joy of Saying No' was a valuable read for me.

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  • in reply to B

    I think so, B. We tend to try hard to fit in so we are liked rather than bullied or otherwise othered. This can lead a person to think their worth is contingent on some level of behaviour or attainment rather than being loved unconditionally and being enough just as they/we are.

    I adopted the phrase 'recovering people pleaser' from Natalie Lue, whose book 'The Joy of Saying No' was a valuable read for me.

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