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Autism, it’s just a 6 letter word.

Coppo

I’m trying to open up a discussion as I’m confused.

I’ve been attending some support sessions and some people celebrate being diagnosed autistic and have a party.

Now thats upto them, their choice.

I know it’s me that needs to see things differently but I find this really difficult to understand at the minute.

All the issues lifelong I have.

Lets just pretend autism wasn't named autism for a minute, after all it’s just a word somebody has put to a set of behaviours etc, let’s say it’s called an apple sandwich instead. 

So let’s just say you’re called Julie and I said “ Right Julie, you are just being born again, would you want to walk up and down the street repeatedly back and forth, touching hedges, gates, fences,  or would you want to not have to do this”

There’s surely not a person alive who would say they want to be born and do that and be an apple sandwich. 

Thats just one behaviour/aspect, there’s plenty more but just one example.

Autism is just a word it’s the things that you seem compelled to do I hate. 

    1. Well, the thing is, not being born autustic doesn't guarantee you would have had a wonderful life. There could have been other problems that you might have had, for example, one if the personality didorders that exists or been born into an abusive household, etc. You might even have been born with some physical disability, so I think we should always keep things in perspective when we bemoan our lot in ife because there are people who are far worse off and also, It's knowing who you are and getting thr best out of your strengths rather than concentrating on the drawbacks. Elon Musk is autistic, apparently, and it doesn't seem to have done him much harm!

  • No matter what you call ASD, it doesn’t change things.

    My diagnosis was a relief because it explained why I struggled with some things. I stopped blaming myself for things out of my control.  

    Yes, not being autistic might mean I would have been spared the trauma that can go along with it — if I had been born into a different family I might have done better at school, got a highly paid job and married the man of dream — or I could have been born into a poverty stricken family in a poor foreign country run by an oppressive dictator.

    For me, there is no point in magical thinking when it can’t change anything. I’d rather spend time on what I can do.

  • in reply to Expecto_Patronum

    But if you choose to take away the negative things that actually make you autistic, as you’ve said, then if you did you wouldn’t be diagnosed surely? 

  • in reply to Coppo

    It isn't just a word though. That's the point. You can call it whatever you want, it's still the same thing - it shapes so much if your personality and way of being.

    I understand you don't like it and that is totally valid and if it were possible to choose then absolutely that would be your choice.

    I think any human anywhere would choose to take away the things they find negative in their lives in fairness. So yes, if I had that choice I would take it. But I don't see that as choosing not to be autistic. 

    I'm sorry you've had such a difficult experience.

  • in reply to Expecto_Patronum

    Absoluteiy I would like to be born again without it, it’s just a word.

    it ruins lives, the isolation, the loneliness, the numbers in your head, the things you do that others think you’re crazy.

    i am bitter I know that, parents were taking me to the doctors in the early 70s as a young child and doctor saying, it’s his nerves, he might grow out if it, I don’t know what’s wrong with him etc 

    So if you could choose which parts to take away I’d take away all the bad, negative ones, the ones which have got you diagnosed in the first place, so ultimately choosing not to be autistic.  

  • The difficulty with saying I wouldn't want to be autistic given the choice, is that you can't choose what is taken away. Yes there are some things I would love to be rid of. But it would take away some of the positives and the things that make me me too. I wouldn't be being born again as me without some negative traits. It would be an entirely different person and I'm just not sure how I feel about that. 

    I think you'll find there's plenty of people that would not give up being autistic given the choice, there are others like you that feel strongly that they would and then there's people like me who just aren't really sure and it'd probably depend on what day you asked me.