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Trying to connect

Take5

Hey everyone 

Just wanted to say hello really… it’s been a long time since I posted on here and just felt the need to. 
I don’t know if I will stay or not and don’t know if I will fit.

I thought I was eventually starting to figure things out since my late diagnosis at age 50. Therapy was going well and been regular there for around 2 years but all or a sudden I have found myself nowhere again. I have lost any enthusiasm I had for anything, My interests are gone and unreachable at this point and I just don’t feel joy about anything anymore. I sometimes wish I had never discovered that I was autistic. The difference now knowing is that I do have an excuse for not socialising which has cut me off from people even more than pre diagnosis…. I honestly don’t know what is worse? My marriage is destroyed which is kind of okay because I wasn’t treated respectfully for being neurodivergent but obviously there is much work to do there for which I have no energy. 
I’m constantly told that I need to get back on the SSRI’s when they only served me very short term. I found after a few years these were extremely difficult to get off with some quite disturbing withdrawals. 
I have tried finding some group meet up sessions locally as I think I am lonely but there is nothing close by as far as I can find. 
For someone who was making good progress with some positive changes I just feel terrible. I have been telling myself that I should never have been assessed or diagnosed and I’m constantly in tears.

I am not expecting anyone to respond to this post, I just needed to put it out as I’m feeling quite desperate with my mental health at the moment.

So hard to be positive 

Parents

  • Hi,

    Sorry to read how your diagnosis has affected you.

    I got mine in Feb 2025 and still trying to work things out. I was happy to get mine as it gave me answers to a lot of things, but at the same time I became scared of things that I never had much of a problem with before diagnosis.(  struggled to meet up with my old workmates for a retirement do) I'd known these people for years then suddenly realised I didn't even know myself, so social events became a bit more of a problem.

    I see from your profile that you're into bikes. I had a lifelong interest,  and used to race mx.  Going to MXoN at Ernee  in October with my old club. Will be first  race trip away since getting diagnosed  so feeling quite apprehensive about it even though I've been there before. 

    If you fancy  chatting about bikes or anything, sometimes it can help when thoughts are on the negative side.

Reply

  • Hi,

    Sorry to read how your diagnosis has affected you.

    I got mine in Feb 2025 and still trying to work things out. I was happy to get mine as it gave me answers to a lot of things, but at the same time I became scared of things that I never had much of a problem with before diagnosis.(  struggled to meet up with my old workmates for a retirement do) I'd known these people for years then suddenly realised I didn't even know myself, so social events became a bit more of a problem.

    I see from your profile that you're into bikes. I had a lifelong interest,  and used to race mx.  Going to MXoN at Ernee  in October with my old club. Will be first  race trip away since getting diagnosed  so feeling quite apprehensive about it even though I've been there before. 

    If you fancy  chatting about bikes or anything, sometimes it can help when thoughts are on the negative side.

Children
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