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Do you ever feel ashamed of being autistic?

LivAgain

Hi,

I know it sounds like an awful thing to say and I'm sure it will spark controversy but this is just a question I have never felt able to ask other autistic people and tonight I just thought, "Why not? People are welcome to disagree with me if that's how they feel."

Anyway, I've been having a rough time lately and feel very ashamed of a lot of things. One thing I'm certainly ashamed of is being autistic. Everything about it feels like a threat - a threat to my femininity, to my appearance, to how others will perceive me. It's hard to put into words but it's almost as though the symptoms don't worry me (I don't actually have a great deal of symptoms, really; not nowadays anyway) but the label itself is damaging me more and more every day.

I feel so guilty for feeling like this but I don't want to wonder anymore. Does anyone else feel like this?

Thank you,

LivAgain 

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Liv

    I'm really sorry that you are feeling bad about your autism. I doubt that I'm going to be able to lift you out of your mood myself as I can see, and you have said, how you are affected by your depression. I know what depression can feel like and watched my father suffer from it for many years, I know it is a really serious thing.

    Have you got any people to talk to that have come out the other side of it? I suspect that you won't be able to take much notice of people that haven't gone through it but it might help to talk to other people who have either come through it or are battling with it in their daily lives.

    One of the unfortunate and unavoidable features of this forum is that people mainly come here in a state of distress with some major problem on their plate. The picture here will be much more negative than an overall view of many sufferers who are successfully getting on with their lives but who don't have the time or interest to hang about here.

    I hope you can find some way to unlock the real you and get some more fulfilment and interest back in your life. I really think that the future is brighter than what you are going through at the moment.

    I also know how irritating and exasperating and challenging it is to have autism. It is a daily challenge and I have good days and bad days with it myself. On a good day I see it as a puzzle to be solved, a mountain to be climbed and I can see my good points. On a bad day it is desparate and Churchill's "Black Dog" is in charge. Try and remember the possibilities rather than the problems, remember the good days and try to get through the bad.

    Take care :-)

    RS

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  • Former Member
    Former Member

    Hi Liv

    I'm really sorry that you are feeling bad about your autism. I doubt that I'm going to be able to lift you out of your mood myself as I can see, and you have said, how you are affected by your depression. I know what depression can feel like and watched my father suffer from it for many years, I know it is a really serious thing.

    Have you got any people to talk to that have come out the other side of it? I suspect that you won't be able to take much notice of people that haven't gone through it but it might help to talk to other people who have either come through it or are battling with it in their daily lives.

    One of the unfortunate and unavoidable features of this forum is that people mainly come here in a state of distress with some major problem on their plate. The picture here will be much more negative than an overall view of many sufferers who are successfully getting on with their lives but who don't have the time or interest to hang about here.

    I hope you can find some way to unlock the real you and get some more fulfilment and interest back in your life. I really think that the future is brighter than what you are going through at the moment.

    I also know how irritating and exasperating and challenging it is to have autism. It is a daily challenge and I have good days and bad days with it myself. On a good day I see it as a puzzle to be solved, a mountain to be climbed and I can see my good points. On a bad day it is desparate and Churchill's "Black Dog" is in charge. Try and remember the possibilities rather than the problems, remember the good days and try to get through the bad.

    Take care :-)

    RS

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