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Burnout, don't enjoy my hobbies etc

Julius3997

Hello, I'm an adult male 31 autistic and possibly ADHD it was suggested to go for an assessment for that as well, a bit of a rant I guess I'm frustrated today ha.

But yeah I've had burnout for the last few years, my memory isn't great and I'm always trying to balance self improvement and inner critic, but I can never tell when I'm being completely comfortable and getting into bad habbits or when I'm actually showing signs of being close to burn out. Anyhow I don't have many friends, non that understand my situation really. I want to get back into art or complete some projects, even just read more. But I always struggle with tasks and get burnt out, or it comes randomly like I did just a bit of social activity then bang I can't do anything for days. It's frustrating because I don't have anything that's good to do in this time, I like video games but I'm too tired and strained to play them, watching things doesn't seem to be too good possibly movies but then there is friction with that trying to find ones. A lot of the time I just end up sleeping. Anyhow I am upset I can't really get over it at the moment that I can do things in theory but I can't get anywhere unless at a snails pace because of this, I'm quite an impatient person haha and I'm upset I suppose I spent my twenties living with a lot of anxiety and marginalized and now I feel the grief of the reality that I can't get to things I want to get to. I imagine this is pretty common to go through anyhow. How do people deal with the boringness of burnout? Like it's not quality time at all just milling around, possibly eat the easiest food, noone socializes with me in these times. I try not to catastrophise but I already feel lonely and now more I think I won't meet people as I couldn't find a companion when this can happen and I won't be able to do much. Anyhow it's not all bad I just wish things could be different sometimes and get bored of these cycles and being in a messy flat on my laz etc haha. I did find some autistic events so hopefully will try that I guess it will be more trying to do less and learning not to use too much energy on other people's expectations I just find it difficult as I really want to achieve things and get out of the rut I've been in past few years xD

Parents

  • Hi  . Don't beat yourself up over this! I've had burnout many times over the decades [I'm in my 70's]. It's a pain to experience but now I see it as the body and mind re-setting - which is necessary, so you must allow it to happen. At such times, it is not possible to socialise - being solitary is perfectly ok at such times. It is also an opportunity to re-assess your life, which is what you are doing without realizing it Key2!!  I still tend to drift in and out of apathy but the following helps.  

    I have a few major 'sort outs' of hobby materials, putting the stuff for my disparate interests in easily accessible places, giving excess stuff to charity shops, discarding stuff too broken for repair or out-of-date. I have sewing gear in one box, research books classified onto specific bookshelves, writing materials & computers in a tiny room [formerly a coal shed]. That way, everything is accessible when I'm ready - whether it's weeks or months before I go back to that interest. If I don't feel like doing anything in particular, I might have a re-sort, or clean some books or complete a small project - could be a couple of hours, or a day, or more - but it gives impetus. But it's also ok to simply gaze at what you have with the satisfaction of knowing you CAN DO these things when you are ready, because the materials are easily to hand. 

Reply

  • Hi  . Don't beat yourself up over this! I've had burnout many times over the decades [I'm in my 70's]. It's a pain to experience but now I see it as the body and mind re-setting - which is necessary, so you must allow it to happen. At such times, it is not possible to socialise - being solitary is perfectly ok at such times. It is also an opportunity to re-assess your life, which is what you are doing without realizing it Key2!!  I still tend to drift in and out of apathy but the following helps.  

    I have a few major 'sort outs' of hobby materials, putting the stuff for my disparate interests in easily accessible places, giving excess stuff to charity shops, discarding stuff too broken for repair or out-of-date. I have sewing gear in one box, research books classified onto specific bookshelves, writing materials & computers in a tiny room [formerly a coal shed]. That way, everything is accessible when I'm ready - whether it's weeks or months before I go back to that interest. If I don't feel like doing anything in particular, I might have a re-sort, or clean some books or complete a small project - could be a couple of hours, or a day, or more - but it gives impetus. But it's also ok to simply gaze at what you have with the satisfaction of knowing you CAN DO these things when you are ready, because the materials are easily to hand. 

Children
  • in reply to Marianne72

    Thanks, I just got back to logging in but appreciate this. I think reframing what is useful to do is something I'm working on and I can give myself smaller goals that help to these ends, recently I got a bit better on not starting too many different things haha. It's always easier to start something new but it makes space overwhelming, but I like the idea for planning to make an interest easier to do.