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Burnout, don't enjoy my hobbies etc

Julius3997

Hello, I'm an adult male 31 autistic and possibly ADHD it was suggested to go for an assessment for that as well, a bit of a rant I guess I'm frustrated today ha.

But yeah I've had burnout for the last few years, my memory isn't great and I'm always trying to balance self improvement and inner critic, but I can never tell when I'm being completely comfortable and getting into bad habbits or when I'm actually showing signs of being close to burn out. Anyhow I don't have many friends, non that understand my situation really. I want to get back into art or complete some projects, even just read more. But I always struggle with tasks and get burnt out, or it comes randomly like I did just a bit of social activity then bang I can't do anything for days. It's frustrating because I don't have anything that's good to do in this time, I like video games but I'm too tired and strained to play them, watching things doesn't seem to be too good possibly movies but then there is friction with that trying to find ones. A lot of the time I just end up sleeping. Anyhow I am upset I can't really get over it at the moment that I can do things in theory but I can't get anywhere unless at a snails pace because of this, I'm quite an impatient person haha and I'm upset I suppose I spent my twenties living with a lot of anxiety and marginalized and now I feel the grief of the reality that I can't get to things I want to get to. I imagine this is pretty common to go through anyhow. How do people deal with the boringness of burnout? Like it's not quality time at all just milling around, possibly eat the easiest food, noone socializes with me in these times. I try not to catastrophise but I already feel lonely and now more I think I won't meet people as I couldn't find a companion when this can happen and I won't be able to do much. Anyhow it's not all bad I just wish things could be different sometimes and get bored of these cycles and being in a messy flat on my laz etc haha. I did find some autistic events so hopefully will try that I guess it will be more trying to do less and learning not to use too much energy on other people's expectations I just find it difficult as I really want to achieve things and get out of the rut I've been in past few years xD

Parents

  • First of all, Julius, I wish you luck in this time.

    I'm a 51 year old male and I recognise all this very well. I've lost so much interest in the things I used to enjoy. I'm a gamer too, but find myself bored after 30 minutes of a game. I love to write, and am 10k words into a novel, but try to get back into it of late and I fail abysmally. The same with the family tree I've spent 15 to 20 years of my life doing.

    I turned to other things. I started going out for long walks. I'll take some sunflower hearts and mealworms down the local pond and feed the ducks or the pigeons. That gives me a warm feeling inside, and a long walk can eat up 3 hours. It's also helped me finally lose weight.

    I also started to do something I'd long wanted to do and began to learn German with duolingo. I can do 15 minutes a day of that and feel I've achieved something. Some days I might like to spend 30 minutes. It's just another little thing.

    If you want to game, maybe find a game that's out of your usual comfort zone. See if there's a free trial and try that. Sometimes something new can trigger some new enjoyment.

    I hope you can find some reassurance in your life.

Reply

  • First of all, Julius, I wish you luck in this time.

    I'm a 51 year old male and I recognise all this very well. I've lost so much interest in the things I used to enjoy. I'm a gamer too, but find myself bored after 30 minutes of a game. I love to write, and am 10k words into a novel, but try to get back into it of late and I fail abysmally. The same with the family tree I've spent 15 to 20 years of my life doing.

    I turned to other things. I started going out for long walks. I'll take some sunflower hearts and mealworms down the local pond and feed the ducks or the pigeons. That gives me a warm feeling inside, and a long walk can eat up 3 hours. It's also helped me finally lose weight.

    I also started to do something I'd long wanted to do and began to learn German with duolingo. I can do 15 minutes a day of that and feel I've achieved something. Some days I might like to spend 30 minutes. It's just another little thing.

    If you want to game, maybe find a game that's out of your usual comfort zone. See if there's a free trial and try that. Sometimes something new can trigger some new enjoyment.

    I hope you can find some reassurance in your life.

Children
  • in reply to nidriks

    That sounds good re: birds, animals in general is good to see and interact with. I guess it's a friendly feeling as you're doing something good for them I can see how that's good for mental health. Yeah I think if I could do things over with gaming I would have the minimum setup like just one console or a PC, I always have multiple projects or things on the go and it tends to lock things up so I'm working at the moment on getting down to less simultaneous things. But yeah I like the idea of playing new games but it's hard to get started and even turning on my computer or something becomes a barrier haha. But I appreciate the advice. I'm trying to get into reading again as well, I do tell myself I read things on my phone all the time so at least there's less a feeling of losing touch with the activity in itself. But yeah usually when I get a good stint with it is because it's something that really engages me, and especially novels are easier to get through. Anyhow I relate to that coming in and out of things you've been doing for a long time, it's swings and roundabouts sometimes.