Relationship counselling - Audhd and neurotypical

I used Relate in the 80s and found my particular counsellor OK, although I've heard it's very variable. My husband and I ran through various counsellors at the time, and I've seen two or three more by myself, since. I've since had very basic counselling training, as well as a couple of other 'soft' skills training, such as mediation and facilitation. Looking back in the light of all that experience, I'd say Relate is fine for straightforward issues, but not trained to deal with neurodiversity. It's possible that most counselling services aren't, and if I were looking for counselling now, the first question I'd ask the counsellor was how experienced they are with ADHD/Autism.

Couples counselling is difficult enough in person and I wouldn't want to try it online as it's far easier that way to evade the counselling in one way or another. Besides, reading the body language is an important as what people say - or don't say. If that's the way you would both prefer to go, you might be able to find someone in this site's directory. It covers counselling but I can't see a way to filter for couples counselling and you might have to plough through all the entries to find what you want.

I wonder if everyting needs to looked at through the lens of autism/adhd? I'm sure there are things, particulalry in couples counselling that will be the same for NT's and ND's, I'm thinking of differences in libido, something that often brings couples to counselling. I'm not sure how looking at it through an ND lens would make any difference? Many people feel uncomfortable talking about sex and thier needs and desires, or simply don't have the language to express what they feel I think its a bit of a misnomer to think that only ND's have problems speaking about intimacy, plenty of NT's do too. Then, even if you can speak easily, what lens do you use to look at something like one partners needs and desires being at total odds to thier partners?

I wonder if everyting needs to looked at through the lens of autism/adhd? I'm sure there are things, particulalry in couples counselling that will be the same for NT's and ND's, I'm thinking of differences in libido, something that often brings couples to counselling. I'm not sure how looking at it through an ND lens would make any difference? Many people feel uncomfortable talking about sex and thier needs and desires, or simply don't have the language to express what they feel I think its a bit of a misnomer to think that only ND's have problems speaking about intimacy, plenty of NT's do too. Then, even if you can speak easily, what lens do you use to look at something like one partners needs and desires being at total odds to thier partners?