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Does anyone else with ASD ever feel like they irritate people?

TwelveTwelve

Apologies if this seems like an odd question!

But does anyone with ASD ever feel like they irritate people? Friends, family, colleagues etc. Sometimes the feedback I get is that I "give off a vibe" that possibly seems like I am dis interested or annoyed, I'm not, but it seems to create an environment where lately I feel like I annoy people for simply being myself.

I'm pretty sure I really struggle to recognize emotion in other people, and I worry that might mean I miss the mark, but I don't know what is my ASD and what is other people's general issues. Has anyone had any similar experiences? Do other folks on here with ASD ever feel like this? 

I don't want to irritate people obviously, but I also don't want to blame my ASD on something completely unassociated, and I especially don't want to think people are irritated when they are not, it's just my poor understanding of reading peoples emotions!

Parents

  • Yes. I reached the level of Senior Software Engineer with one company and I heard a complaint that I was snappy and irritable with people. They came to me for help but I'd bite their heads off.

    I didn't realise I was doing it. I was focussing on work and hated being interrupted. I changed afterwards but it was hard, I'm still annoyed when I get interrupted but try to be polite... ugh!

  • in reply to imekon

    Thats what I find interesting, I have been grilled in the past for saying something in which I did not on anyway mean to cause offense or annoyance, to be later told it was offensive and annyoing to someone! I manage a team of people (realising now that was probably not the best choice for me to pursue!) I seem to either irritate people because I say something bluntly, or because I am "too kind" , a sympton of being a people pleaser. 

    Out of interest, how have you found your career as a software engineer? I have always loved the thought of doing something similar and imagined it would suit my likes in terms of workflow. 

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  • in reply to imekon

    Thats what I find interesting, I have been grilled in the past for saying something in which I did not on anyway mean to cause offense or annoyance, to be later told it was offensive and annyoing to someone! I manage a team of people (realising now that was probably not the best choice for me to pursue!) I seem to either irritate people because I say something bluntly, or because I am "too kind" , a sympton of being a people pleaser. 

    Out of interest, how have you found your career as a software engineer? I have always loved the thought of doing something similar and imagined it would suit my likes in terms of workflow. 

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