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“You gotta work hard and just push through”

aurelis

Something along these lines. So when like today, I’ve woken up and not done nothing but be in bed until mid afternoon, I feel guilty. I’m not at work being active and being productive. And I don’t know how to separate working hard with how I beat myself up. 

I’m able to notice more things that I know will make me shut down and struggle and more able to realise that I can’t push through as vigorously as I want to the following day. But I feel this strong sense of guilt when I always get distracted, or crash into anxieties and depressions, that I’m not doing enough, and that I need to work harder to have a place in this world. 

I compare myself to others and previous generations who had no choice but to tough things out, and use that as my parameter. And not ever being able to compete at that level just fills me with a sense of failure.

Parents

  • In the past, time was slower, change was slower, there were long periods of sameness. There was also less crowding.

    It is possible some of us would do better in those conditions, and it's modernity that is harder.

    Be gentle yourself, don't spare help when you need it, and help others when you can.

    This is already good use of your time.

  • in reply to emanningis

    Was there less crowding? I guess it depends on when and where you were and more imporatantly how wealthy you were. If you were rich you coud afford space, but if you weren't as most people weren't then you could be stuck in a cold, damp, draughty tiny house, with an outside toilet between a dozen or so families and one standpipe in the street to share. Go back a couple more centuries and people were living with thier animals, humans on one side and cows on the other, the heat coming off the animals helped keep you warm, but with only an open gutter to take waste away it would of been unhygenic and stinking.

    Living in a village now and having lived in a few before, it can be suffocating, everybody knows everyone elses business and feels free to comment on it, this was especially true years ago, people were concerned for thier neighbours, but just as now some people were infering busybodies.

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  • in reply to emanningis

    Was there less crowding? I guess it depends on when and where you were and more imporatantly how wealthy you were. If you were rich you coud afford space, but if you weren't as most people weren't then you could be stuck in a cold, damp, draughty tiny house, with an outside toilet between a dozen or so families and one standpipe in the street to share. Go back a couple more centuries and people were living with thier animals, humans on one side and cows on the other, the heat coming off the animals helped keep you warm, but with only an open gutter to take waste away it would of been unhygenic and stinking.

    Living in a village now and having lived in a few before, it can be suffocating, everybody knows everyone elses business and feels free to comment on it, this was especially true years ago, people were concerned for thier neighbours, but just as now some people were infering busybodies.

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