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Tips for unmasking/finding the "real" me after diagnosis at 52

Belnarlo

I got diagnosed 2 months ago at 52. I have read "Unmasking Autism" and got myself the "Unmasking Autism Workbook for Autistic Adults". I had to throw the workbook away as it was maming me stressed and depressed. All the exercises assume some knowledge of what child hood was like and how events in my childhood led me to mask. As that was 40-50 years ago, I really have no clue what drove my masking and I struggle to even know what parts of "me" are masking and what might be unmasked me.

While I have been able to let some of "me" surface while walking the dog all alone with no-one watching, does anyone have any tips how to figure out where I might be masking after all these years?

Parents

  • Late 50s here and diagnosed AuDHD last year. I strongly relate to the vibe of this post vs anything else on "unmasking". By this age, we are just who we are - not a Kinder egg with a mystery "real" personality inside. I have made a conscious effort to try to connect with my physical sensations this past year and how they relate to what I'm doing (I struggle to connnect with more nuanced emotions in myself). This is getting me somewhere re. truly understanding what fills vs drains my bucket. I now feel I have permsssion (from old age too Smile) not to constantly look people in the eye when talking to them. And I've reflected on past experiences that led to e.g. migraines and M.E. and now understand some of this may likely have been down to "over-extroverting" (though I am actually an extrovert).

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  • Late 50s here and diagnosed AuDHD last year. I strongly relate to the vibe of this post vs anything else on "unmasking". By this age, we are just who we are - not a Kinder egg with a mystery "real" personality inside. I have made a conscious effort to try to connect with my physical sensations this past year and how they relate to what I'm doing (I struggle to connnect with more nuanced emotions in myself). This is getting me somewhere re. truly understanding what fills vs drains my bucket. I now feel I have permsssion (from old age too Smile) not to constantly look people in the eye when talking to them. And I've reflected on past experiences that led to e.g. migraines and M.E. and now understand some of this may likely have been down to "over-extroverting" (though I am actually an extrovert).

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