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Surprises.

Roy

Does anyone else struggle with surprises?

My wife has surprised me with some concert tickets for later in the year. I feel mean for not reacting in the way expected. It caused me to shutdown as there were too many variables to think about. I’m then thought of as not being grateful. I very much need to examine something before it being suddenly being put on my internal calendar.

In truth I have always hated surprises, I’m supposed to look forward to the event, I will definitely be thinking about it for months, but for different reasons. Travel, parking, hotel, and food, to name a few. The thoughts will invade my brain, at the same time I’m expected to smile and seem excited. Sorry for what seems like me being ungrateful, I don’t have anyone else who might understand.

Parents

  • That part of my own "spiky profile" has it's moments too  .

    If it's possible to get the "prep" done for the trip early then i am often OK with it - mostly about reassuring myself.

    The tricky thing is that whilst i consider myself to be quite good at such prep it is often done at the cost of a lot of energy - and i put it off.

    So changes in routine are hard work - maybe focus on the benefits and be steady about the prep?  "accentuate the positive..."?  hehe say's I - putting off something I've been fretting about doing for a couple of weeks by being on this website!

  • in reply to Phased

    Thanks for your reply, I will most probably be okay by the time we go.

    I waited nearly 3 years to be assessed, the result finally gave me an answer. I find everyone treats me just the same, if I could do something before then I should be still able to do it now. Nobody seems to make any allowances. I remember a family member being told I’m autistic, the reply was, “ how does that change anything?.”

    I don’t expect people to ‘tip toe’ around me, I just thought  I might get generally treated a bit better. That’s most probably what the underlying problem is.

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  • in reply to Phased

    Thanks for your reply, I will most probably be okay by the time we go.

    I waited nearly 3 years to be assessed, the result finally gave me an answer. I find everyone treats me just the same, if I could do something before then I should be still able to do it now. Nobody seems to make any allowances. I remember a family member being told I’m autistic, the reply was, “ how does that change anything?.”

    I don’t expect people to ‘tip toe’ around me, I just thought  I might get generally treated a bit better. That’s most probably what the underlying problem is.

Children