I have been living on a high energy life that l have really enjoyed and l never viewed it has a disability.
It's my identity that l am not ashamed of it's who l am .
If l don't function like this then l would never be able to live life because the alternative would be living a life in bed and never doing nothing,it's the way that my brain works for me. I love me. With all my ups and downs.
But having a little knowledge on how to manage it better or just being mindful to other people and how my life looks like to others and when to stop.
Because l have lived a vibrant life of ADHD it has left out other parts of my live that is my own personality to not show through and then l have felt like l am broken.
I have found it hard to find work that's suitable for me , working with other people is very uncomfortable and very scary for me it feels like being closaphobic,l keep looking for the exit sign .
I was always late, got sacked, because l can't organize my life.
Tried climbing bennifits pip but was sent out a letter that said, we do not believe you, so this has caused me more damage and a deeper rejection by society.
I also struggle with health conditions but no one will believe me.
Because everything is masked by ADHD.
But l am old now and really a diagnose isn't going to help me l spoke with a mental health worker and he said l had symptoms of ADHD and autism and did a online assessment,test.
But l am left frustrated that l have had to cope on my own, always pushing to be excepted it's been a very hard journey of emotional up and downs,what keeps me going is a determination to never give up, but the cost of living with depression and anxiety, so never give up.
