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I have trouble asking for things I want/need

Jamesmac

Whenever I try to bring something up regarding personal requests, I always feel really ashamed or guilty, and it makes it really hard for me to get the help I need for various things.

Parents

  • Me too, it dosen't help that when I have asked for things the answers been no, I have this conundrum every xmas and birthday, I'm asked what I want, I think for ages and say what I'd like, then I'm told no.

    The other thing about asking for help is are you going to regret it? I find I often do as the help I'm given isn't actually what I've asked for, I find myself having to justify why I want what I want. Some people take over and you get a copy of what they have, which isn't what works for you, or they take so long you get a professional in and then they get upset, personally I dont' think weeks is an acceptable length of time to wait for someone to fix a leaking tap.

     Then there's the other sort of help, I was told by a therapist that I should ask for help more often, so I did, I ended up phoning everybody I knew, not a large number, and everyone was out or otherwise unavailable. I reported this back to the therapist who seemed a bit cross at this, which didn't help.

    I never ask anyone else to do my shopping, they can't keep up with my dietary needs and get the wrong stuff.

Reply

  • Me too, it dosen't help that when I have asked for things the answers been no, I have this conundrum every xmas and birthday, I'm asked what I want, I think for ages and say what I'd like, then I'm told no.

    The other thing about asking for help is are you going to regret it? I find I often do as the help I'm given isn't actually what I've asked for, I find myself having to justify why I want what I want. Some people take over and you get a copy of what they have, which isn't what works for you, or they take so long you get a professional in and then they get upset, personally I dont' think weeks is an acceptable length of time to wait for someone to fix a leaking tap.

     Then there's the other sort of help, I was told by a therapist that I should ask for help more often, so I did, I ended up phoning everybody I knew, not a large number, and everyone was out or otherwise unavailable. I reported this back to the therapist who seemed a bit cross at this, which didn't help.

    I never ask anyone else to do my shopping, they can't keep up with my dietary needs and get the wrong stuff.

Children
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