Recently diagnosed and struggling with work

Hi everyone,

I got my autism diagnosis in November last yeah and then got my adhd diagnosis in march this year. I am in full time work in a very peopley job. I disclosed my diagnosis and things to my boss when i got them and initially she was very supportive. However she seems to struggle with the idea that i might need some reasonable adjustments. She thinks that, because I've gone so long without my diagnosis, that i've been fine until now so why do i suddenly need this support. I've tried to explain its more so that i can function better and be better at my job and not burn out but she doesn't seem to understand. When i talked about how i feel more autistc now i have my diagnosis and autstic skill regression she said that if people know theyll regress after their diagnosis why would you get diagnosed? and that kind of bothered me. I feel like i'm finding things harder, getting more emotional and coping less and it makes me feel stupid.  I feel like i can't ask for adjustments because i'm being seen as attention seeking and being difficult when i coped fine until i've got my diagnoses. I just feel awful and a burden and I don't really know what to do. 

Parents
  • I am sorry you have had this experience. I have worked at my place for a long while and appeared to cope, but things got harder until I had my first burnout. This is when I decided to go for getting a diagnosis. I am currently waiting for a response regarding my request for reasonable adjustments and have prepared explanation of why my difficulties were not previously apparent. I sent an email explaining what going into work is like for me, but unseen by others. There is some useful information on this website and also ACAS. If you are able to explain this in writing and they don't do anything, you will see guidance of what you can do next.

  • Thank you, I guess i just feel like they don't believe me when I say its hard but a different level of hard than what is experienced by the majority of people where i work. It's more like, I'm not on a support plan, I seem to be ok, so why should i need extra support. When I want to say yes I am functioning ok at work but when I get home i cannot do anything at all, can't clean or cook a proper meal or wash or anything I just have to sit and be quiet and still for hours because my brain doesn't work at the end of the day. 

Reply
  • Thank you, I guess i just feel like they don't believe me when I say its hard but a different level of hard than what is experienced by the majority of people where i work. It's more like, I'm not on a support plan, I seem to be ok, so why should i need extra support. When I want to say yes I am functioning ok at work but when I get home i cannot do anything at all, can't clean or cook a proper meal or wash or anything I just have to sit and be quiet and still for hours because my brain doesn't work at the end of the day. 

Children
  • I know what you mean. The link that pinkchocoholic has given you has helpful information and a link to ACAS giving you useful quotes. I would also explain the effect that work has, as you have explained above. 

    You might also find it useful to look at what is said about masking.

    I hope your boss is able to understand the need when they have more information.