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I texted my cousin tonight

NAS71232

I probably shouldn't have. I just wanted to know if she is ok. I felt bad as I haven't contacted her for years. She didn't reply and I'm not surprised. I was going to tell her bout my condition.

My head jumps around like a jumping bean. I'm in pain. I'm undiagnosed and I'm sure I have severe ADHD.

I'm on my own. I don't have friends. I'm living with my mother atm, but I'm looking to get a DSS property. That would be the worst. I would rather have a council property with a garden, but they rejected my application to be on the waiting list. I'm posting this as my mind is compromised and maybe I can be on the list with advice.

My GP has me on pregabiln twice a day for anxiety and I have to take other  meds for my divertiulosis and barrett's oesophagus. I need help please. My mother doesn't understand.

If I can be in a council house, I can die happy, even if in pain. I won't have the anxiety of a private landlord walking in when he likes and kicking me out with two months notice. The fact that they rejected my application with all my medical ailments tells me that I'm a stain. Burnt toast.

I can almost hear it, "You don't have children, so why should we house you? Who cares? It's your problem"

I'm fully aware that my mind is deteriorating, but I'd just like to experience it in private.

Is that even possible?

I won't talk to anyone. I'll just tend to my plants.

  •  I know what you're thinking. I know I should, but I'd prefer not to if possible. My GP always asks if I have thought about it, but I lie and say no. TBH, what would you do with burnt toast? I've appiled to my council and they'll bin it without question. I can't get past the actual action. It's very gross.

  • They done a colonoscopy and she said they wil have to operate soon as she has only seen that serverity in 90 year olds. That might explain the heavy fatigue I'm living with. I have trouble waking up. My GP said it might be the combination of the divertiulosis and the barrett's oesophagus.