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Assessment A!

emma90

Hi everyone

I went through right to choose with my GP back in November and have been waiting for the next steps since then. Today I got a call telling me my part A assessment would be tomorrow! They've given me no details about it except to tell me to have photo ID available and it'll be a 150 minute appointment via video call... I don't think I've ever had a conversation with a person for that long. Is there a general structure these assessments follow? My mind is racing at the moment... I'm worried I'll have a breakdown during it or use all my energy accidentally masking and pretending I'm okay because that's what I've done all my life. 

Are these people generally friendly or is it formal? Any advice/feedback from own experiences/ any anything would be really appreciated right now! Thank you.

Parents

  • Well I think that was horrific - the woman doing it spent most of the time saying 'no that's not what I'm asking' whenever I answered anything. The way she talked to me, felt like I was annoying her the whole time.... 

    Silver lining, surely I can't get anyone as rude and lacking empathy for the second part?!

  • in reply to emma90

    Ah, that's not great  :-(

    Couple of thoughts to share that might be OK - if you're in the right emotional state for them?

    Could it be that you were accidentally masking?

    Also when I'm especially anxious I can get very defensive.

    Whether the answer to those answers is yes, no or maybe, it's not ideal if the person leading what could be a difficult conversation is unable to maintain their emotional calm and their means of expression.

    Hope you're OK now.

    All the best.

  • in reply to Phased

    Definitely a possibility - I'm not sure at this point what is me and what is me pretending to be whatever the world expects me to be.

    I dont know if it was me not understanding the questions or my answers not fitting the options on her form at times... she asked about whether I have a best friend I see regularly and when I said that would be my partner or my sister she told me that's not a best friend and couldn't seem to fathom me not having someone else I would 'go on a night out with' as she put it. It felt judgemental at times... whether that was her or me, or a combo who knows

  • in reply to emma90
    emma90 said:
    she asked about whether I have a best friend I see regularly and when I said that would be my partner or my sister she told me that's not a best friend and couldn't seem to fathom me not having someone else I would 'go on a night out with' as she put it

    That bit doesn’t seem right to me.

    I recall questions about friends during the first part of my assessment. The assessor first asked me “how do you define a friend—what does a friend mean to you?”. The question lead to me concluding that in my early years until my 40s, my friends were my dogs and other animals”. It took me a bit of time to get to that answer because for years I had a tick list in my head of what a friend should be (that didn’t include my ex. husband), so I appreciated being asked that question before the assessor went on to discuss my relationships with humans.

    Sounds like lack of experience and/or interest in autism/autistic people, which in itself could be caused by all sorts of other reasons.

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  • in reply to emma90
    emma90 said:
    she asked about whether I have a best friend I see regularly and when I said that would be my partner or my sister she told me that's not a best friend and couldn't seem to fathom me not having someone else I would 'go on a night out with' as she put it

    That bit doesn’t seem right to me.

    I recall questions about friends during the first part of my assessment. The assessor first asked me “how do you define a friend—what does a friend mean to you?”. The question lead to me concluding that in my early years until my 40s, my friends were my dogs and other animals”. It took me a bit of time to get to that answer because for years I had a tick list in my head of what a friend should be (that didn’t include my ex. husband), so I appreciated being asked that question before the assessor went on to discuss my relationships with humans.

    Sounds like lack of experience and/or interest in autism/autistic people, which in itself could be caused by all sorts of other reasons.

Children
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