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Friends

InterTrails

how do people find making friends? New ones….do you text a lot? Should you meet up much or do you just wait until you are invited somewhere before initiating a meeting yourself 

Parents

  • As an adult its been a lot harder. I think friendships are more complex as an adult. Ive shied away from it all throughout life because of the feelings of awkwardness. The odd times when I have put myself out there ive felt like im masking and any follow up attempt has me making excuses to get out of it because I dont feel like it was the real me they have met. Masking can be exhausting and isnt something you would want to be doing to maintain any friendships 

    its a bit of a catch-22 for me. I want that super deep connection with someone i would call a friend but struggle with the steps that would lead to it maybe

  • in reply to FitMisfit
    FitMisfit said:
    its a bit of a catch-22 for me. I want that super deep connection with someone i would call a friend but struggle with the steps that would lead to it maybe

    That’s what I struggled with for many years and it’s still difficult. I think being older leads people to be more accepting of themselves and others and my friends know me and don’t demand more than I can give. They know I need lots of time on my own and to give me plenty of notice when arranging something.

    I feel fortunate to have encountered the people who became the friends I have now. Friendships didn’t happen for me until I began part-time studies in my 30s, and my other friends came much later. I’m still amazed that some people put up with me as I had been used to not having friends for so long.

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  • in reply to FitMisfit
    FitMisfit said:
    its a bit of a catch-22 for me. I want that super deep connection with someone i would call a friend but struggle with the steps that would lead to it maybe

    That’s what I struggled with for many years and it’s still difficult. I think being older leads people to be more accepting of themselves and others and my friends know me and don’t demand more than I can give. They know I need lots of time on my own and to give me plenty of notice when arranging something.

    I feel fortunate to have encountered the people who became the friends I have now. Friendships didn’t happen for me until I began part-time studies in my 30s, and my other friends came much later. I’m still amazed that some people put up with me as I had been used to not having friends for so long.

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