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My husband refuses to believe he has adhd/autism!!! Life is he'll sometimes

NAS82939

My husband refuses to believe he has adhd/autism or both and living with him is taking a toll on my mental health and i really need help in how to deal with an adult who is in denial and does not listen to my advice?

He doesn't talk to me if he doesn't get his way. He doesn't communicate with me about anything unless he wants to talk. Im loosing my patience with him and need to be shown how to deal with this behaviour. Some of his family members have it and have been diagnosed so they also help with how I should deal with his behaviour but is this my life now???? This is tiring and mentally hard to deal with.

I need help!!!

Parents

  • I know what this feels like I’ve been shut out for a long time for not having things go his way it was a repeated cycle but it wasn’t I’m having a bit of space or quite time. It was cold hard control. I tried for such a long time to talk about things and understand different perspectives but in the end i realised the only person doing any understanding was me but I never wanted to give up on him because I could see how it would end up. He was also a person who projected their opinion at you so based on what you were doing he would second guess your reason even though it wasn’t true and wouldn’t listen to anything that would cause me concern or give me any advice just tell me I was wrong at the expense of my mental health and to make other external people happy. He’s entirely somewhere else on the spectrum than me but many of our friends think he isn’t autistic even though I’m fairly certain of it.

    There’s not a lot you can do if he’s not willing to talk or understand and work on things….  

    Maybe try and tackle it from a different angle for older people they don’t always want to acknowledge mental health and neurodiversity it’s very much more a recent acceptance now that we are breaking down stigmas. With more awareness I think it is starting to make people feel more positive and inclusive but if you’re partner is someone from an old sociological view point then it might be difficult to get him to soften to that idea especially if you don’t approach it from a softer place

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  • I know what this feels like I’ve been shut out for a long time for not having things go his way it was a repeated cycle but it wasn’t I’m having a bit of space or quite time. It was cold hard control. I tried for such a long time to talk about things and understand different perspectives but in the end i realised the only person doing any understanding was me but I never wanted to give up on him because I could see how it would end up. He was also a person who projected their opinion at you so based on what you were doing he would second guess your reason even though it wasn’t true and wouldn’t listen to anything that would cause me concern or give me any advice just tell me I was wrong at the expense of my mental health and to make other external people happy. He’s entirely somewhere else on the spectrum than me but many of our friends think he isn’t autistic even though I’m fairly certain of it.

    There’s not a lot you can do if he’s not willing to talk or understand and work on things….  

    Maybe try and tackle it from a different angle for older people they don’t always want to acknowledge mental health and neurodiversity it’s very much more a recent acceptance now that we are breaking down stigmas. With more awareness I think it is starting to make people feel more positive and inclusive but if you’re partner is someone from an old sociological view point then it might be difficult to get him to soften to that idea especially if you don’t approach it from a softer place

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