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Finding it hard to understand friendships with neurotypical individuals

Lozza

I am an Autistic adult who is constantly finding it hard to understand why it’s hard to communicate with friends over things. I either overthink or over explain and I was wondering if anyone else had any thoughts on this or experiences to share in regards a to how they navigate friendships with others who are neurotypical while being Autistic?

Parents

  • Is it causing a problem? They may accept that you over explain. If it is a problem, then just go to the answer or last line, say that and see if anyone queries it or asks why. Then you can explain how you got there. I no one says anything then they don't need the reasoning and just accept your answer. You could mix it up a bit, so you can give some short, medium and longer answers. Then see what works and get more comfortable. Follow people's cues, if they look confused or change the subject they might not have got your point, so add some more.

    The over thinking is on you. You could take things less seriously. Or just assume people mean what they say, but if in doubt just ask at the time. You just need to watch out for jokes and and sarcasm, but you can ask if you are not sure. Just make it simple for yourself, don't try and guess all the time.

Reply

  • Is it causing a problem? They may accept that you over explain. If it is a problem, then just go to the answer or last line, say that and see if anyone queries it or asks why. Then you can explain how you got there. I no one says anything then they don't need the reasoning and just accept your answer. You could mix it up a bit, so you can give some short, medium and longer answers. Then see what works and get more comfortable. Follow people's cues, if they look confused or change the subject they might not have got your point, so add some more.

    The over thinking is on you. You could take things less seriously. Or just assume people mean what they say, but if in doubt just ask at the time. You just need to watch out for jokes and and sarcasm, but you can ask if you are not sure. Just make it simple for yourself, don't try and guess all the time.

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