Giving and recieving gifts

I understand the reason for giving. Sometimes there is guilt (where value is involved) or regret or dissapointment. As soon as it becomes an obligation its not really a gift, the problem with getting older is that we often make our own choices or are asked what we want to be gifted. So in the spirit of gifting (one based on zero expectation with an element of surprise) theoretically zero value is required in the exchange. If you receive a gift it probably best to accept it graciously.

In so many ways modern life, particularly xmas, leads us to feel obligated. The modern xmas which starts in August is built on these emotions of guild and obligation, because we then overcompensate through our consumption. However the only people who benefit from this are young children who only see the gifting experience not the heavy apparatus of social manipulation going on.

When someone refuses my gift or says they dont want anytbing this is when it becomes confusing. In terms of what they mean and how that changes future events. Giving low value sybolic gifts in exchange with the other person is a good way around this if you agree with them first. But the burden of expectation is always there.

Really all that matters is the word 'spirit' because this is how you give, this is what matters not what you give.

I understand the reason for giving. Sometimes there is guilt (where value is involved) or regret or dissapointment. As soon as it becomes an obligation its not really a gift, the problem with getting older is that we often make our own choices or are asked what we want to be gifted. So in the spirit of gifting (one based on zero expectation with an element of surprise) theoretically zero value is required in the exchange. If you receive a gift it probably best to accept it graciously.

In so many ways modern life, particularly xmas, leads us to feel obligated. The modern xmas which starts in August is built on these emotions of guild and obligation, because we then overcompensate through our consumption. However the only people who benefit from this are young children who only see the gifting experience not the heavy apparatus of social manipulation going on.

When someone refuses my gift or says they dont want anytbing this is when it becomes confusing. In terms of what they mean and how that changes future events. Giving low value sybolic gifts in exchange with the other person is a good way around this if you agree with them first. But the burden of expectation is always there.

Really all that matters is the word 'spirit' because this is how you give, this is what matters not what you give.