Burnout Vs Depression

copingwithdivergence said:

I feel stuck because the approach to handling a depressive episode and a burnout are quite different. 

From my understanding of burnout ( see https://www.autism.org.uk/advice-and-guidance/topics/mental-health/autistic-fatigue ) it will be stress that builds and builds until it starts to affect your ability to function and depression is often a symptom of this.

To manage it I think you need to manage the stress.

To manage the stress you need to understand what is stressing you and take steps to manage this through a few strategies.

1 - avoid stressers where practical. e.g. If going to a football match with mates is a big stressers then stop going.

2 - limit stressful situations where practical. If seeing great aunt Doris stresses you out them make it time limited. Don't let it last all day but plan an exit and tell her up front "I have to leave at 2pm" or whatever.

3 - learn to cope. There are a myriad of techniques that can help you deal with unavoidable stress from mindfulness, meditation and learning to set boundaries.

4 - make sure you have time for recovery. After any particularly stressful situation you will probably need time to wind down and recover. Build these spaces into your schedule.

All the above take a lot of practice and refining once learned, and to learn them I strongly recommend getting a psychotherapist who has experience in helping autists as they are worth their weight in gold.

The above would be what I would suggest in a nutshell, but I'm just some random person off the internet and you should ideally do your own research before considering anything I say.

My breakdowns/burnouts are torture, let me explain. When I’m exhausted, tired and depressed, the creative or goal achieving side of my brain goes into overdrive. My brain constantly fires ideas at me of things I can be doing, it’s like torture, my brain can’t go off. It just keeps constantly firing and firing and my brain goes into overdrive but my body and mind  are exhausted. 

Before, I would follow through with every idea and literally run myself into the ground but now I just lay in bed while my brain keeps running like a carousel, still exhausted and depressed. Crying helps but it alarms those around me so I’m not able to cry. Humming helps too but it annoys those around me. 

As for therapy, I had a good therapist but our sessions are over so I’m looking for another good fit. Looking for low cost options is making it difficult though but I’m still searching. To be honest, I can’t even read the links you sent to me, I tried a few but they make me feel more exhausted. 

copingwithdivergence said:

Before, I would follow through with every idea and literally run myself into the ground but now I just lay in bed while my brain keeps running like a carousel, still exhausted and depressed

When I do find myself in a burnout like state I use a technique I learned from the practice mindfulness where I get a big notepad, start writing down all the things buzzing around in my head (I write each on its own little post-it and stick it onto the notepad) then when I have all the ideas captured inescapably on paper then I can heave a big sigh of relief and know I can rest, safe in the knowledge it will all be there when I come back.

Being able to free up this processing capacity is a huge win for me - I can now rest and sleep, so beginning the healing from burnout.

When I have had a good sleep (sometimes I use an antihystamine to help me sleep solidly) then I will come back to the notepad and start sorting the items out that I wrote down.

I will pick out the urgent ones and the important ones - the rest can wait for now.

I'll prioritise these as the most urgent first, the important ones that will become urgent soon as the next to deal with then the rest of the important ones after that.

I'll break these down to individual tasks and put them all on a big list, marking which are dependant on other things higher on the list then when it is all sorted out will have another rest - then I start on the individual tasks, doing as many as I can before I start to feel overwhelmend then will stop.

Repeat until all the priority stuff is out the way, review the remaining stuff on the to-do list to prioritise it then have a well earned rest.

Looking back at the sheer voume of tasks ticked off the list is a powerful motivator to show what you are capable of with some organising (including organising your own recovery/rest times) and can help motivate you to get on with the rest of the stuff next.

While all the tasks together can look like a bit of a whale I always use the mantra

"how do you eat a whale? One bite at a time!"

That is my favourite meathod that I've used more times than I care to mention over the years.

Thank you

Thank you