"You can't be autistic"

Sorry, if such topic was already discussed in the past in this forum.

I had a discussion recently with my mom and she is furious that my therapist suspects me autistic. She says that im nothing even close to autism. Here is why: 

- in fact I cried as a baby whenever taken in arms, but later on I used yo come to give a hug if someone told me so (it was stressful, but she doesn't know it, because I failed to express how much stressed I was)

- in fact I was always a weirdo and not playing with kids, my roleplay was very poor, but I was and still am very creative and exceptionally good at some fields (foreign languages,  arts, geometry)

- I'm in her words very special and different than others and I have my rich wonderful inner world (I shared with her how I perceive taste of words). So it's impossible that im autistic 

- I'm too attractive (I heard long years, that im ugly, but it seems to have changed within last 10 years and yes, now at age 37 I hear "beautiful young lady")

I feel like a freak, I was so many times abused, bullied, isolated, mistreated over the years, told that im unlikeable and it's my own fault, told that there us something wrong with me, forced on meds, misdiagnosed etc. And now when my therapist suggests a diagnosis that finally makes sense, my mom says its not and of course she wouldn't take part in the diagnosis process.  Like always preventing me from getting help, gaslighting,  diminishing my problems or laughing them off. My daughter's teacher in the nursery says it's visible I need help. I really don't know what and how to do...

Just sharing.  Maybe someone else here experienced similar things.

Parents
  • I am very creative and imaginative and I am diagnosed. It's a spectrum for a reason, you don't need to have every trait which she obviously doesn't know! 

    I also didn't get parental input, different reason for me, on the form it freaked me out so much that I'd have to admit to my family I was struggling, I ended up explaining to them and it wasn't required in the end. As everyone says, it shouldn't hold you back if you explain upfront as they should take that into account, even if she does fill a form out.

    I hope you can get some help either way.

  • She does not accept thing such as "autism spectrum" in her understanding autism is only the "profound autism" I don't fit this picture so I'm not autistic.  She thinks of herself as the most knowledgeable person especially in mental health, she gives people diagnoses or exclude them and there is no power which would convince her otherwise. Her knowledge = objective truth. I only reminded her, that she is not a psychiatrist and shouldn't diagnose her husband with BPD as she did or any other disorders. 

Reply
  • She does not accept thing such as "autism spectrum" in her understanding autism is only the "profound autism" I don't fit this picture so I'm not autistic.  She thinks of herself as the most knowledgeable person especially in mental health, she gives people diagnoses or exclude them and there is no power which would convince her otherwise. Her knowledge = objective truth. I only reminded her, that she is not a psychiatrist and shouldn't diagnose her husband with BPD as she did or any other disorders. 

Children