How to respond to 'Aren't we all on the spectrum'

I've had 2 people recently reply to hearing of my diagnosis 'Isn't everyone on the spectrum?'. I've found that quite insulting. No, autistic people will be on a spectrum of traits. Neurotypicals are NOT on the spectrum as far as I am concerened and have no idea of what we deal with.

What do others think? How do you reply to this cliche? 

Parents
  • 'Isn't everyone on the spectrum?'

    I used to say similar before my diagnosis so I am guilty of this phrase also. It’s something I’d heard many say before and figured or assumed there must be some truth in it however it does very little to validate the autistic persons personal experience which isn’t helpful as I am sure many of us wish more than anything for a little more understanding. 

  • I think many people are probably guilty of having said it pre diagnosis. I think that some people use it as a way of reassuring themselves of their own difficulties when they don't have a diagnosis to make sense of them. Once diagnosed people don't need to relate to that statement anymore and realise that it's not actually a useful or true statement.

  • I still have doubts over my diagnosis, there are times when I see the signs clearly but that’s not often enough to provide clarity. Of course it’s a spectrum and I don’t wish for any further difficulties but it’s very difficult for me to say out-loud that I am autistic without feeling like a fraud. I sort of feel like I should expect some confident acknowledgment of the diagnosis within my belief system but it never comes, I am not confident on a lot of things though. 

  • Thank you for the last bit there, means a lot. I do try remind myself it would be difficult to convince professionals that I am autistic if I wasn’t but yes the late diagnosis part of it adds perhaps more uncertainty than those who have lived a life with the diagnosis. 

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