Meltdowns in public

My young adult son had a very bad meltdown in public. He verbally assaulted someone and banged on the car and caused trouble in the street. He doesn't like the person he shouted at and, unfortunately, he came across them in the local area. They have reported him to the police. He is now very angry and wants justice. He says they swore at him and threatened him. He is telling lies to me and crying and incredibly anxious now. Waiting for the fall out next week. A social worker is now involved. We've tried various therapies and medications but to no avail. Will he always have this mindset? He always thinks he's been bullied by others and has to get justice.

Parents
  • Since he is clearly concerned about the consequences maybe something good will come of it. It is the potential consequences that stay your hand, you can have the thoughts you just don't act on them.

    He will remember this and it may encourage him to walk away in future.

    You save more face by being calm and measured than by shouting or getting physical. It's not an easy lesson to learn, especially when you are sure you are right. But it is also important to save your energy for what really matters.

    Hopefully he will be able to reflect on it afterwards and learn something from it. The important thing will be honesty so that a truthful narrative can be constructed and the right lessons learned.

Reply
  • Since he is clearly concerned about the consequences maybe something good will come of it. It is the potential consequences that stay your hand, you can have the thoughts you just don't act on them.

    He will remember this and it may encourage him to walk away in future.

    You save more face by being calm and measured than by shouting or getting physical. It's not an easy lesson to learn, especially when you are sure you are right. But it is also important to save your energy for what really matters.

    Hopefully he will be able to reflect on it afterwards and learn something from it. The important thing will be honesty so that a truthful narrative can be constructed and the right lessons learned.

Children