Risk aversion

'Life is about taking risks and seizing opportunities', so say the adreniline junkies and other idiots, I don't want to take risks, I have cPTSD there's no such thing as good adreniline, I sometimes slide into something, its more like an idea comes into my head and some how it happens. Maybe the opportunities that come my way are some kind of test, for me to say no too, saying no to things is important. Why would I want to jump out of an aeroplane to show that I'm not adverse to taking risks or something other such daft activity?

I've pretty much given up on sugar coating my thoughts from other people, they're pretty much guaranteed not to like them, so why tie myself in knots when the fumits will hit the windmill anyway? People come up with such stupid ways of putting others down too, like the reason I want the patio refurbished isn't because its collapsing and potentially dangerous, but because I watch to many tv property programs! WTF.

It's difficult because the industry I'm in (creative) life is always about that, so I'm not sure how to relax because I am thinking that I am not seizing some sort of chance to develop my career. So everything is like an opportunity for my career. It means I feel extremely guilty often because I am thinking that I need to work hard and live in order to take another opportunity so I can live a fulfilling life, and it feels really exhausting.

aurelis said:

I'm not sure how to relax because I am thinking that I am not seizing some sort of chance to develop my career.

Setting a timetable can help with this. Work out what time you can set aside and plan what tasks you need to do and start using the time to network, learn, practice and whatever else you can use to make the progress you want.

It helps to really work through all the things you need to do and break these down to smaller and smaller tasks you you can just list the ones that need to be done today, or the most urgent ones and get stuck into it without worrying about the big picture stuff.

Then once a week look at all the tasks you have crossed off your list and realise you are really working through it so it gives you a sense of achievment.

Progress in terms of big picture results can be lumpy however but trust the process.

aurelis said:

I'm not sure how to relax because I am thinking that I am not seizing some sort of chance to develop my career.

Setting a timetable can help with this. Work out what time you can set aside and plan what tasks you need to do and start using the time to network, learn, practice and whatever else you can use to make the progress you want.

It helps to really work through all the things you need to do and break these down to smaller and smaller tasks you you can just list the ones that need to be done today, or the most urgent ones and get stuck into it without worrying about the big picture stuff.

Then once a week look at all the tasks you have crossed off your list and realise you are really working through it so it gives you a sense of achievment.

Progress in terms of big picture results can be lumpy however but trust the process.

Okay, I will try this. I’ve been trying to get over the feeling of “missed opportunity” and awful lot recently, and the feeling of “needing to be ready” before mixing with people so I’m “ready and stable”. I know it’s probably not a helpful way of thinking though.